Perhaps I have blinders on....

We have four grading periods at my daughters' school. After the first and fourth grading period, they have teacher conferences where you come in at an appointed time and meet with all of the teachers. During the second and third grading periods, they have what they call student-led conferences. This is where you come in at an appointed time and meet with your child who goes through a folder of each class that includes the grade, samples of their work, and a sheet of paper with questions they have answered. For example:

Q: Is this the best job I can do?
A: Yes, I think this is the best job I can do.

We are now at the third grading period and this week is the student-led conferences. I have not had mine yet because I am damn busy right now with a homebound mother, a sick child, chauffeuring duties, and various other activities. The times available have not worked out for me. I didn't think this was such a big deal until I discovered that if you don't come in for the conference then you and your child must do the conference at home and then answer some questions. One paragraph for each question. Because it is my fault that I'm unable to make these conferences I have decided to write all of the paragraphs for my children.

1. My conference went well because....my mother kept her mouth shut and let me talk. I discussed how well I was doing, what my goals were for the rest of the year, and how I thought I could improve on my grade. My mother listened to me and let me finish my sentences without interruption, despite the fact that her face was slowly turning a cherry red.


2. My conference could have been better if....my mother had just kept her mouth shut. Unfortunately, when it came time for the discussion part of our conference my mother began ranting and raving. She talked about how ridiculous this whole student-led conference nonsense was because she lives with her children and sees how they are doing daily. She feels that we discuss goals, grades, and improvements nightly. I had to listen to her as she griped about how some kids are able to retake tests and bring up their grades if their parents aren't happy, yet her child gets her grade lowered because she logged her reading on the back of the reading log because the teacher was out of logs at the time. She wasn't happy that some classes have discipline problems and she feels that the academics are suffering for it. She hated that my conduct was poor and blames herself because she has "mouthy genes" and has passed them on to me. I was very concerned about her because she kept mentioning that her head was going to explode.


3. What is one positive thing I've learned about myself or my academics? I learned that it isn't my fault that I talk too much. It is because I've inherited my mother's "mouthy genes". I also learned that this trait comes from both sides of our family and so I've got the double whammy.


4. What study skills work best for me on tests and quizzes? The study skill that works best for me on tests and quizzes is going over the information with my mother. Having her quiz me before my tests, ensures that she knows I know the information, as well as it lets me off the hook when the teacher takes off two points on my essay question because "we already know that the Spanish American war is a war" when I was restating the question into my answer. That way it isn't my fault when her head begins to explode.


5. Parents, please explain at least one positive outcome of your child's student-led conference. The fact that it was over was a tremendous relief to me. Listening to the reasons why my daughter's grade went from an A to a B despite her A's on tests and assignments makes my head explode. Knowing that my daughter gets 110% on tests each week in class and wondering why that doesn't make the teacher think that this might be too easy for my daughter makes my head explode. Feeling helpless and not understanding some of the teachers' rationale causes me great stress and doesn't help with my New Year's Resolutions of "letting go". I would have to say that the positive outcome of this conference was that my head didn't actually explode and that I am still intact and waiting for next grading period's conferences when I can sit face to face with the teachers.