Attention guests of the EFR

By the second day of our stay at the Evansville house, dubbed the Elshoff Forest Retreat, we were quite adept at using the intercom system. We found it came in handy especially when we were in different rooms throughout the house. (The following is just a sample of the silly things heard over the intercom and don't necessarily belong to the correct speaker)

Darcy: "Attention guests of the EFR, the billiard tournament will begin in the game room at 4:00 PM.  Anyone interested in participating should report to the game room for sign-ups."

Cara: "Attention guests of the EFR, the tour bus heading on a tour around the city of Evansville, with stops at the Donut Bank and The University of Evansville, will be heading out promptly at noon. Please meet at the main entrance."

 

Madison:  "Attention staff.  Toilet paper replacement needed in the bathroom on the main floor promptly."

Kelly: "Cruise Director, Julie McCoy, please report to the promenade deck.  Julie McCoy to the promenade deck."

 

Picture taken from:  http://outtaherejcp.blogspot.com/2010/08/what-love-boat-did-for-cruising.html

Probably the funniest thing that happened regarding the intercom happened after we had returned from a day away from the EFR.  Upon our return Kelly discovered the master bedroom balcony door ajar.  This set us off on an inspection of the house; not an easy thing to accomplish in a house that size with only four people.  

I went upstairs and the other three searched the main floor.  Two of the bedrooms, which were full of items from the owner, had full walk-in closets.  I hadn't really checked these rooms out until this search and I discovered that the closet in bedroom #1 actually wrapped around and joined the closet into bedroom #2.  There was a window at the rear of the closets and bulletin boards on each side of the rooms' closets.  I thought this a very cool addition especially for kids and I spent a bit of time wandering from side to side marveling at the detail and thought.

 Closet in bedroom #2 - view from room - turn

left at the window to enter other closet

Closet in bedroom #2 - view from closet looking into bedroom

I entered the first closet and walked in it toward the window checking for intruders.  I turned the corner and walked into the other side of the closet and then into the other bedroom.  At this point I imagined the intruder in the room I had just vacated so I went back into that room and started over, but I realized that as I went on one side of the closet the intruder could be on the other side.  I immediately went to an intercom.

Me:  "Attention staff.  I need an assistant on the upper floor spare bedroom #1."

And while one person went through on one side, another person went through on the other and we declared the upstairs intruder free.

Madison:  "Upstairs clear."

Darcy:  "Roger that.  Main floor clear as well."

We were not really all that concerned, but it was growing dark and the house had tons of entry points (there was an alarm system, but we were unsure of codes, etc. and so we left it alone) and just maybe a homeless person had stopped by for a cool place to sleep for the night.  We all looked at each other when it came to checking the basement floor.

Kelly:  "I say we just let the poor homeless person sleep down there since we aren't using it."

Darcy:  "But what if we want to play pool?"

Kelly:  "He can join in?" 

Me:  "I'll do it for heaven's sake or we won't be able to sleep tonight and I'm not going to do this in the dark."  And I trooped downstairs, both the girls at my heels for "my own protection".

We split up and searched the basement floor checking to be sure doors and windows were locked.  Above, Kelly waited at the top of the stairs, armed with a knife (just in case), peering down into the doorway and checking periodically behind her in case someone might sneak up quietly.   We apparently did not realize how on edge she was until Madison spoke into the intercom downstairs.  The intercom that happened to be right by Kelly's ear.

Madison:  "Basement clear!"

Kelly began screaming at Darcy because that is who she thought yelled into the intercom.  By the time we got upstairs, laughing at her nervousness, she was pacing the kitchen and waving the knife and yelling at all of us.  We found it hilarious and by the time she had calmed down it was dark outside and lightning streaked the sky.  We joked about being stuck in the house without power, and no sooner did that leave someone's mouth then the power went out and we were left sitting in the dark.  It didn't last but a second, but it was enough to get us moving assembling flashlights, lighters, and candles to store in the kitchen...just in case.

"Attention guests of the EFR.  Rest assure that the staff has everything under control.  If we should lose power, please remain calm and stay where you are.  A staff member will be around with lighting to move you to the kitchen on the main floor where food and drink will be served and a variety of card games will be offered."