The nonsense that is my life

I created the invitations and the programs for an upcoming school event that is happening this week. On Monday night I was finally given the okay to print out the program and bring it with me to our meeting the next day. I had been working at my desk most of the day and kept noticing that when I printed things there were ink blots on the paper. When I printed out the program I knew the blots were not going to pass muster with me or anyone else. I sat and wondered what in the world could be the issue, and came to the conclusion, eventually, that it was a printer issue.

I went to the laser printer that my husband had insisted upon buying and opened it up. I pulled out the tray where the cartridges reside and when I pulled out the black cartridge black powder came pouring out of the side of the cartridge. It went all over my hands, all over my desk, and all over the inside of the printer. How it avoided going all over my carpet is beyond me, but it didn't.

I had not eaten all day. I had just finished making dinner before I ran into the office to print off the program. I had a raging headache. Now I stood covered in black dusty powder that told me there was no way in hell this was something that would easily be fixed. That being the case, meant that I wasn't going to get this program printed. Not getting that printed would ruin everything because I could not send this program to someone else unless they too had the program I had used to make it. I'm afraid I lost it.

Me: "OMG! Why is this happening? What the ^%$ is happening? Can't anything just go right?"

I went on and on as I ran around with the cartridge in my hand, tilted to one side so as not to spill more powder everywhere. Madison came to calm me down and the two of us cleaned up the mess. I put everything back together again and printed my program. Of course it came out covered in gray and I knew the roller needed to be cleaned. I repeated my earlier episode of opening and pulling out the cartridge, which of course repeated my earlier mess of spilled powder, only at a lesser degree. I cleaned the roller and tried again, but it was a no go. I was not going to print on this laser printer.

We have another laser printer that resides under Tom's desk. We are told not to touch it, but the girls do so when they need another printer or when ours is on the fritz. To do this they have to transfer their project on to a jump drive which they plug into the printer and print. We all avoid Tom's computers as much as we can. Number one, because he has everything password protected and number two because he would have a fit if he thought we were using his computer for anything helpful.

Madison and I discussed how we would be able to use his printer, but because his computer was off and password protected Madison decided she would just unplug it and carry it into my office and plug it in to my computer. I thought that a big job, but was desperate. Unfortunately, for us Tom came home before we could do that, and we knew there was no way he was going to allow us to cart his printer all over the house.

I gently told him my issue and he went into my office to deal with it. He couldn't fix the printer so he converted my file to a PFD file so that I could put it on to a jump drive and print it out "anywhere". He looked around my desk.

Him: "Do you have a thumb drive?"
Me: "I do. Let me look."

I went through drawers. I went through paperwork. I went through cabinets, and pen containers, and anything that had space for a jump drive.

Me: "OMG! Why do these kids mess with my stuff? I have one jump drive. It is always right here in this container. Doggone Darcy."
Tom: "How do you know it was Darcy? Why are you blaming her?"
Me: "Because she is the one always at my desk and on my computer and around all of my stuff. MADDY???"
Maddy: "Yes?"
Me: "Did you take my jump drive and use it for any reason?"
Maddy: "No."
Me: "See! Darcy probably took it and you probably found it somewhere where she left it and you probably threw it away."
Tom: "No. I didn't do that. I haven't even been in here."

We ended up using a jump drive of Maddy's. When Tom realized I was going to use his printer he took the jump drive and said he would print my stuff. Which he did. With my help. After it was all done and I had put it all away, ready for tomorrow, I was going to sit down and finally finish eating.

Tom: "If you ever need a jump drive, I have them right here in this drawer." He pulls out MY jump drive. The one that I was searching frantically for earlier. "In fact, take this one. Here. This one has a nice long chain on it so you won't lose it. You can put it around your neck."

The man is still alive because he knows too much about electronics. I'm just saying...