Grad Week - Part II

She had been waiting for this day ever since deciding on her college, getting accepted, and being assigned a room and a roommate. She did all of the work. She decided on a major, one that came out of left field for us, but one that obviously excited her. She researched the best universities with that major and devised a list. We stepped in, after much consideration, and told her that in having two children we learn things from the first and in doing so sometimes the second child benefits from that learned knowledge and sometimes she doesn't. We made a mistake with the first child in letting her fly to an expensive life another state. We told this one she had to stay in state, and much to our surprise, she seemed relieved. Unlike her sister, she hates cold weather and being far from home, and it turned out that her major is very prominent right here in the sunny universities. Or in Austin at the University of Texas, so whew! We made that decision in time.

She was accepted to all of the Florida universities and asked to apply into all of their honor colleges, but she had already decided. She liked the university closest to home, although she had a few months of wondering if that was too close, and so I drove slow to each visit we made to the "big city" to show her that with traffic it was at least an hour away. She applied and received several nice scholarships and she got the big one that Florida gives out to its homegrown students who remain in state, the one my eldest daughter didn't get to use by fleeing. From the moment of acceptance, she was ready for graduation and moving on.

The month of May was IB exams and the stress level in our house rose steadily. Our usually happy go lucky child was sullen, stressed, and snippy. She studied and studied, muttering under her breath as she went over mounds of papers and books accumulated over the last four years. I did what I could by tip toeing around the house, keeping her clothes cleaned, and shoving food in front of her face as she sat at her desk in the Steelers room. Every test day she returned home claiming she had failed and every time we hugged her and told her we were proud of her no matter her earning the IB diploma or not. We are so proud of her IB accomplishments, straight A's through a rigorous program that can suck your soul, and proud of the woman she has grown into.

The last exam day we celebrated. We had Starbucks and we kept shouting, "Hurrah!" when the moment hit us. She and her friends went out to dinner, and then she came home and watched television, something she hadn't done in weeks. Now she was done and could concentrate on cleaning out her locker, collecting her stoles and medals, and helping me with the IB Senior Celebration which I reminded her was at the top of the list.

Darcy: "Graduation is at the top of the list."

She spent days deciding on the perfect dress, and then she had to shop for shoes and make-up, despite my reminding her that all of that would be hidden under a gown and a cap. It wasn't as bad as it had been for prom, but it was a close second. Everyone in the house stepped back the morning of graduation and allowed her the shower and the room to get ready for the 4:00 p.m. graduation. She and her friend, with me in the back seat, left at 2:00 p.m. following her dad with a full van of family toward the home of the Tampa Bay Rays in St. Petersburg because nothing says graduation like one done on a professional baseball stadium.

I had done this once before, but that time I still had this one at home with another two years to go. This time, I realized was it. The end. I wouldn't be back here for any of my kids' graduations. I wouldn't see the teachers. I wouldn't hear the stories about their antics. I must have had a look on my face as all of that seeped into my brain because my family guests kept asking me how I was doing. I was okay.

I sat with my friend. Her daughter and mine have been together through fifteen years of school, starting when they were three years old. We were paired together in a goal of seat saving, but by the time the ceremony started we just sat down side by side, and I thought that fitting. We have been through it all together; the ups, the downs, the drama, the highs, the lows, and the drama. We have been a part of the drama, yet here we still sat. Together. Watching our girls still together. They will go their separate ways, and the future might not include them remaining together, and as we sat watching them walk the stage to pick up their diploma, that all flitted through my head. Once upon a time that would have wounded me, but I've learned, and I'm excited for both of them and for their new beginnings. If their friendship is strong, meant to be, then they will find a way, and if not, well, they had these fifteen years.

It was over in a blink of an eye. We hugged people and then walked around and around outside the stadium through the crowd searching for our kids. We took pictures. We paired them with one another, told them to smile, and then we hugged each other offering congratulations, My daughter beamed. She had come, conquered, and is now ready to walk off toward her next phase. And really, that's what it is all about.