R.I.P. Thumb

After Darcy's birth we discovered that she sucked her tongue while in the womb and thus had trouble outside the womb when it came time to eat.  She kept her tongue on the roof of her mouth and sucked it.  We had to spend a few moments before feeding massaging her tongue until finally after two months she stopped and latched on to the breast.  From those early days of the tongue sucking she went on to sucking her two fingers, a pacifier and finally her thumb. Obviously she has had to suck.

In the third grade she was diagnosed with tongue thrust, a condition where the tongue pushes against the front teeth when at rest or when swallowing.  She went to a speech pathologist but therapy could not begin until she stopped sucking her thumb.  She never did.  This past summer she had an orthodontist consult and he recommended an appliance that would fit on the roof of her mouth and would keep her tongue from reaching the front teeth.  It would also stop her from sucking her thumb.  He would put in the appliance even if we started therapy with a speech therapist.

Darcy was okay with it all.  She wasn't thrilled, but a part of her wanted braces and a part of her thought this appliance might not be so bad.  She didn't want to stop sucking her thumb, but she was ready to take the next step.  We set the dates.

Two weeks ago she got her braces, but the appliance did not fit.  She came out of the appointment quite excited at having another four weeks of time with her thumb.  That was the time frame we were given in fixing the appliance.  A week later we got the phone call that the appliance had been adjusted, but due to other circumstances we were unable to come in and have the appliance put it.  The office lady and I decided to keep the original dates.

Wednesday we went into the orthodontist for spacers that would help open up space between her teeth so that the appliance would fit.  These would be worn for one week at which time we would return for the appliance.  All the way to the appointment Darcy sucked her thumb.

The spacer appointment takes about five minutes.  After thirty minutes of sitting in the waiting room, I began to get a sick feeling in the bottom of my stomach.  The slow boil began inside my head.  If they were putting in that appliance today without her being prepared....

The technician came out and called me back.  Slowly steam started wafting out of my ears as I followed her through the maze of hallways listening to her chippy voice tell me that they had gone ahead and put in the appliance as her spaces were still open from two weeks ago.  By this time I could see the back of Darcy in the chair, sitting ramrod straight.  I came to her side, took one look at her forlorn face, and dropped to my knees to grab her in a hug.  The huge tears rolled down her cheeks and the steam poured from my ears and my stomach lurched.  I told her I hadn't known.  I hadn't known they would pull this dirty trick, and had I known I would not have let them do it.  Not without letting her prepare for the loss of her thumb, her security blanket.  The tears just continued rolling down her cheeks and into the front of my shirt.

The orthodontist came running.  He didn't understand.  From his point of view he had just wasted three weeks of braces that weren't doing any good against a thrusting tongue.  He thought we would be thrilled that we weren't going to waste another week.  I told him she was a thumb sucker and hadn't prepared for that loss today.  She was prepared for next week.  His face fell.  He had a daughter that was a thumb sucker.  He knew.  He felt terrible, but the damage was done.

We left and spent several minutes in the car hugging, both of us crying, Darcy for the loss of her thumb and me for the loss of my baby.  For as long as she sucked her thumb, I still had a little girl, a baby, that enjoyed sitting on my lap or curled against my chest. 

In the end the cold turkey was probably better for both of us.  Darcy had a hard first night and ended up snuggled in bed between us, Molly held tightly in her arms.  She likes me to scratch her back before I say good night now and so I still get some snuggle time.  Her speech is affected greatly, but she laughs along with the rest of her friends and family when she hears herself speak funny.  She cleans her appliance and her teeth very efficiently each night.  She has gotten over the orthodontist's deception.  She is growing up.

I have taken to babying the dog.