And we insert these things up inside our bodies....who knew?

Yesterday the county came back out to check whether our new plumbing issue was related to the old plumbing issue in which the county had been partly responsible for fixing.  The same guys appeared and joked with me about our toilet habits.  They opened the new clean out valve they had put in the last time and we all stared down into the hole.  It was dry.

Me:  "What does that mean?"
Ed:  "Means you have a problem on your side.  Unfortunately."

But Ed, being the nice man that he is, offered to snake a camera down the clean out value to see whether he could find the problem.  I thanked him and left him to go get ready for work.  When I came back out the camera was in and I joined the two on the lawn.  I bent over and peered into the screen.  It was all in black and white.  I could see my pipes and we delve further and further into the squishy hole that winked back at us as the camera wound its way deeper and deeper.

Me:  "This is like traveling through a vagina.  You guys should call yourselves piping gynecologists."
Ed:  (couldn't speak he was laughing to hard)
Other guy whose name I didn't read off his shirt:  "I think my phone is ringing."

Eventually, about 70 feet under my house we came to a white spot at the bend in the pipe.  The water was only trickling out from this point and Ed said there was the problem.  Just some simply stoppage that a snake could take care of most likely from the clean out valve on top of the roof.  They packed up their things and left.  Tom called a plumber and schedule him to come after my lessons.

The plumber arrived after a fierce rain and lightning storm.  He was about 18 years old and cute, cute, cute.  I didn't get his name.  He talked non stop and mostly told terrible jokes.

Him:  "You have a room devoted to everything Steelers?'
Me:  "I do."
Him:  "Didn't they lose?"
Me:  "Shouldn't you get to work?"
Him:  "Did you hear the joke about the broken pencil?"
Me:  "Is this leading up to a joke about the Steelers losing because I am in no mood."
Him:  "Yeah, okay, I probably shouldn't tell you it."
Me:  "Because seriously dude I've had to poop at my neighbor's house all day long."
Him:  "Yeah, it's pointless!"  Smiles.  "Get it?  Broken pencil?  Pointless."
Me:  "I hope you're a better plumber then a joke teller."

He first went to the clean out valve that the county had put in a few months ago.  We stared down the hole.  I informed him of what the county guy had found with the camera.  I told him it looked like a wad of toilet paper, which I hope it wasn't because my husband insists that this problem is my kids' fault and that they use too much toilet paper.
The hole
was still dry.  He put a snake down it and worked and worked.  Nothing.  The sludge was still in my shower.  He went up on the roof and worked and worked.  I got bored and went inside.  When I heard the motor shut off I checked the bathroom.  Problem solved.  I went outside to inform him.

Him:  "Tampons aren't flushable."
Me:  "Is this a joke?"
Him:  "Afraid not."
Me:  "It was a tampon?"
Him:  "Yes ma'am."
Me:  "Well now.  Who could that have been?"
Him:  "I wonder.  That will be $137.50"
Me:  "For a tampon?"
Him:  "Want me to tell a joke now?"