Out of the mouths of my babes

Me:  "I made a killing in the laundry today."

Darcy:  "It was my money.  I lost it!"

Me:  "Hmmm...when I was young my mother made Uncle Rusty and I have to tell her how much money we lost, what clothing article the money was in, and also how it was folded before she would give the money back."

Darcy:  "What if you couldn't do that?"

Me:  "Then she kept the money.  And I am rich after today's laundry."

Darcy:  "I lost ten dollars.  It was in those jeans you just folded."

Me:  "Did you now?  Just ten dollars?"

Darcy:  "Twenty.  It was twenty.  No, really I did have ten dollars in that pocket from when I went out with Savanna."

Me:  "Where did you get ten dollars?  I thought you were out of money."

Darcy:  "I found it in an old purse."

Me:  "Anything else or just the ten dollars?  I found more than ten dollars."

Darcy:  "Maybe I had some change.  Was it change or bills?"

Me:  "Sorry that isn't how it works.  How was your ten dollars folded?"

Darcy:  "Uh, I don't know how I folded it.  I just shoved it into my back pocket."

Me:  "Wait a minute!  That isn't your ten dollars.  That's my ten dollars.  I had it in my back pocket and forgot to take it out last night.  I remember that now.  I can't believe you tried to get my ten dollars."

Darcy:  "Well, you're the one who asked us about losing money.  I figured it was worth a shot.  And you said you found more than ten dollars."

Me:  "Yeah, but you can't tell me how much you lost."

Madison:  "Don't look at me.  I don't keep my money in my pants.  I keep it in my sock."

Kelly got this purse for Madison.  She bought her one last year and someone stole it out of Madison's backpack or it fell out at drama practice.  Madison loved that purse and Kelly happened to find her another one, but when she said that first about keeping it in her sock we thought she meant literally before we remembered her purse.  We all had a good laugh and then I said it reminded me of a Mary Jane joke.  She is a ding dong of a girl who laughs and laughs.  Behold the joke:


Mary Jane and her boyfriend were necking in his car.  Mary Jane's boyfriend put his hand down the front of her shirt, but Mary Jane just laughed and laughed...she knew her money was in her sock.

Darcy:  "What's necking?"

Me:  "Fooling around.  Kissing."

Darcy:  "I don't get why he put his hand down her shirt. He thought there was money there?"

Me:  "He was copping a feel of her breasts."

Darcy:  "EEEWWWWW!"

Me:  "But the joke is that she is so silly that she thinks he is doing it for her money.  You know like how sometimes I put money that I find down in my bra."

Darcy:  "Like my ten dollars you just found in the laundry?"  She grinned.  "Still w