A southern break

After tucking Madison in at college, Darcy and I headed to South Carolina where we have relatives in the Charleston area. I called at the last minute and invited myself and because they are good southern hosts they didn't scold me. Instead they said come on down and so we did. The drive took longer than expected since half of the way was two lane roads instead of interstates, but we arrived safe and sound. Joyce and James live on a large property with a beautiful home that overlooks the "swamp" with their two dogs horses Sophie and Blue. The horses roam the property freely and so it isn't unusual to find them peeking into the windows or standing outside the door looking for treats.

On our second day we drove into Charleston in the evening to reunite with their children, who I grew up with, and their families. We had drinks and snacks at the youngest child's home where we were entertained by their dachshund Griswald and their two children. We had a wonderful dinner at the eldest child's home where we had wine, great conversation with their two daughters (son was off working), and plenty of laughs.

It was a delightful break between dropping off Madison and heading home to ready for the school year. It's kind of crazy that we haven't done this more often. It has been eight years since I last traveled to their homes. Perhaps my new year's resolution this next year should be to travel more to visit relatives!

National Dog Day

All this week every dog owner has been posting pictures and words of love for his/her hound to celebrate National Dog Day. I didn't even know there was such a day, but then again I didn't know about Neither Rain nor Snow Day, Step family Day, or Citizenship Day all holidays coming up next month. National Dog Day was started by a woman to honor dogs and to rescue them from homelessness and abuse. Apparently she also started several other "Days" including National Cat Day, National Mutt Day, and National Puppy Day. She clearly has a lot of time on her paws hands.

In investigating this day I also found that while it has been celebrated nationally on August 26th for the past eleven years it is now going to be celebrated on August 31st due to a conflict with Women's Equality Day. I found that info here. So all of those people on social media have obviously not gotten the memo, but I suppose it is the thought that counts.

Ironically on August 25th the Pittsburgh Steelers, my beloved NFL football team for those that might just be stumbling on this post, signed Michael Vick as their back up quarterback. Vick was convicted on felony charges in 2007 for running a dog fighting ring on his property that resulted in the mistreatment and death of under performing dogs. That has not made many fans happy especially considering the timing of National Dog Day and now social media is blowing up with this news.

First of all, I want to say that I use to not be much of a dog person. I use to be afraid of them when I was little probably due to the mean let-me-rip-your-face-off dog that lived with my aunt on her farm. His name was Kojak and he seriously had no interest in little children except as a meal. Somewhere down the years I got over that fright and enjoyed dogs. That changed to indifference as I got older. They were smelly. They smelled up the house. They jumped on me. I use to pet dogs, but then immediately wash my hands afterwards. Then we got a dog. I have written about this before, but since then I am a dog lover. Every dog I see I pet or exclaim loudly my love of dogs. I find them to have many wonderful traits, and I can communicate with most of them.

Secondly, I did not post my dog's photo on Facebook because he is already my profile picture (And I hadn't a clue about National Dog Day) so I'll post him here now, although the true holiday is now on the 31st.

Lastly, I am not one of those people who are in an uproar over Michael Vick's signing with the Pittsburgh Steelers. I wasn't on the jury. He paid for his crime and served 21 months in prison. He lost his money and his endorsements. He apologized for his crimes and has done a fine job of getting his life back together again. Frankly, the NFL has a lot more to worry about than Michael Vick and his past crimes. And I wonder how do these people who are so outraged about this signing feel about our current quarterback? Have they forgiven him for his alleged crimes against women? Did they even care about that? I mean, really.

Happy National Dog Day. Now on August 31st. 

First day of school 2015

Madison started school a week before her sister. I wasn't there to take the "back to school photo". I asked her to please take one for me. I was sure she wouldn't, but she did. Freshman year of college!

Darcy started her junior year Monday. She wore her favorite outfit, and instead of riding the bus she drove herself...in the dark. Because she starts school at 7:05 am.

Happy School Year Everyone!

We needed what? Out of the mouths of someone else's babe.

My cousin's wife (Jaimee) (does that make her a cousin too?)  texted me last night with a story "for your blog". I liked that and thought that now that my own kids are gone growing and not providing me with stories to regale my readers perhaps I should have a day each week where I write about other people's kids and their funny stories. This week we will begin with Wyatt.

Wyatt was the youngest of my cousin's (Shad) children until his mighty sperm edged its way through tied Fallopian tubes to fertilize an egg and nine months later SURPRISE! Thought you were done with the ten children you already had? Guess again. Number eleven. Okay, that's an exaggeration. They had 3 and now they have 4, but after that many who's counting? Bottom line is Wyatt was the baby and now he isn't. He is nine.

For his ninth birthday the family decided to take their family of eleven six on a road trip that included several hours of driving. I never said my cousin was bright. I imagined they loaded up coolers with snacks and drinks and packed multiple bags of fresh clothing and towels. For as many children as they do have the parents are quite put together when it comes to all of that stuff. Me? I was lucky to get out of the door with my car keys and both of my children. So they all climbed into their van and headed off to some place called Kings Island.

I had to look it up. It is the Largest Amusement and Waterpark in the Midwest! It has 16 thrill rides with names like "Delirium", "Slingshot", and "Flight of Fear"; all nice rides for a nine year old. It has family rides with very un-friendly family names like "Monster" and "Viking Fury". There is a children's area called Planet Snoopy that offers more tame rides, and then there is the Soak City Waterpark with all sorts of pools, activities, rides, and death traps.  Just the sort of place you take your barely-out-of-the-womb newborn. Kings Island is twenty-four miles northeast of Cincinnati, Ohio in a city called Mason which is also the home of one of the largest tennis stadiums. Who knew?

My cousin and his brood live in Indiana and so to travel from there to Kings Island is roughly a three hour drive. I'm not exactly sure what occurred during this three hour drive through the Midwest countryside, but I envisioned sing-a-longs, travel games, and intellectual conversations. As they approached the exit to reach their final destination, the birthday boy piped up from the back seat in a very forlorn, yet matter of fact voice:

Wyatt: "Dad? When we get there I can't go in."
Parents: "What? Why not?"
Wyatt: "I don't have any shoes on my feet and I didn't bring any to wear."

Bottom line. No shoes. The kid walked outside from his house into the van to travel three hours to an amusement park with no shoes on his feet. None. Jaimee texted me this story and in her text she says, "Now WTF? He is 9!" Well, yes, but in his defense he was going to a waterpark. Who wears shoes in the pool?

Text: "But it gets better"

Really? How much better of a story can it get then the birthday boy forgetting his shoes on the way to Kings Island? Well, it does. My cousin's engine, upon hearing this news after driving a million miles, revs right up. No warm-up. Directly to, as the text stated, "steam coming out of Shad's ears". He is about to blow when another voice pipes up from the back seat from his brother Carson. Wyatt and Carson are the best of friends and always together in solidarity. Especially this time.

Carson's tone is not forlorn, but relieved.

Carson: "I can stay in the car with him because I didn't bring any shoes either."

Do I really need to write anything about what must have transpired in that car at that moment? Any parent. Any parent traveling with children. Any parent traveling with older children and a newborn baby know what had to have happened in that car after that statement. Just sit back and imagine the scene. The angry, out of your head, my-god-did-these-kids-come-from-my-dna kind of scene. Been there done that.

Text: "Shad lost all parental control."

Carson is going to be twelve years old. Together these two did not think anything about going barefoot to an amusement slash waterpark. Who needs shoes? Although it obviously occurred to both boys near the end of the drive seeing as how they spoke up with the bad news. How long they sat in the back wondering how to share that news is anybody's guess. My husband and I found the story hilarious because we have all been there in some way or another. I vaguely remember Madison forgetting shoes at one time, although I don't remember the circumstances any more.

The family stopped off at Target and rectified the situation. Not only did Wyatt get a trip to Kings Island, but he got some new shoes for his birthday too. I texted Jaimee that the story was certainly worthy of a blog entry. I did not question their parenting skills in not noticing that two out of their eleven four children were not wearing shoes as they all trooped outside to their van. After all they are sleep deprived.

I did, however, question the position of said newborn's head in his stroller at Kings Island in the middle of Midwestern August heat.

But that will have to be another entry.

Minus one

It wasn't horrible and it wasn't great. It. was. just. fine. It took us longer than we thought to get to North Carolina what with bathroom, food, and gas stops. We didn't get there until the next morning. One AM to be exact. We fell right into bed and then it was morning and time to head back out again to move Madison into her dorm.

We joined the long line of cars backed up out on the road on campus to get into her dorm. Madison told us later that she felt very anxious and nervous and was texting her friend who still had six days before she left home. I was feeling very calm. I had a job to do and do it I would. We inched forward for twenty minutes until we were at the check-in point and we received our 40 minute parking pass and drove into the lot.

Each of us took a hand full of belongings and entered the dorm where we found 293857790 people waiting to use the elevator. "Let's take the stairs!" I shouted doing my best to be positive and uplifting, and the man overseeing the elevator pointed us outside to the stairwell. Where we walked up four flights of 53, yes 53, steps. Did I mention we were carrying huge bundles of stuff in our arms? I was huffing and puffing when we got to the top and volunteered to watch the stuff we dropped put beside Madison's locked door while the rest of the crew went in search of keys and more stuff.

Madison was suppose to be in the Honors dorm, but there was an overflow of 53 students (Madison being one of those 53) and they were placed in the dorm next to the Honors dorm. Instead of a suite in a modern building she ended up in a hotel style quad in an older building. Instead of central air she got window units. Instead of four girls to a bathroom she got eight to one bathroom. Instead of a large room she got a medium size one. We weren't sure what to expect, but the view from her balcony wasn't bad.

I waited for several minutes before the crew returned back up the four flights of 53 stairs their arms loaded with more stuff from the car. Madison had the keys and she opened the door to her new home and we all crowded inside to take a peek. Two beds. Two desks. Two chairs. One wall covered in built-in shelves and closets. On the floor was the carpet I had ordered from a company out of New Jersey that works with the university and delivers said carpet into the room. I volunteered to open the packaging and unroll the rug while they carried more items up the 53 stairs, but by then her roommate and her parents and sister had arrived. The room was quickly crowded with all eight of us introducing ourselves.

The two girls unrolled the rugs and then joined the dads in lofting the beds. Darcy and the other sister continued unloading the car. The mother and I took charge of overseeing all of them as they did the various jobs. Once the beds were lofted and the items all upstairs the dads went outside to bond and the rest of us went to work inside the dorm. Darcy and I emptied bins of clothes and hung them. We organized her desk, her closet, her drawers, and made her bed. Madison put furniture together and hooked up the refrigerator, the microwave, and the coffee pot. It didn't seem to take any time at all and we made lists of all the things the two girls needed that we didn't have. We were done a little past lunch time.

We thought the room was bigger than expected and Madison's anxiety was quickly replaced with excitement. The roommate and family left before we were finished. They live only an hour and a half away so they were "cutting the cord" after lunch and shopping. We left later, had lunch, and purchased more stuff. We went back to the dorm and finished the job. The roommate joined us for dinner and then we bid Madison good-night. She had planned to stay with us that night in the hotel, but felt guilty leaving her roommate behind. We agreed we would hook up the next day and we left.

The university had activities on campus for the next several move in days so hooking up with her turned out to be between activities. She was busy in the morning so Tom took us to his alma mater to show us how "much better a school it was". He claimed to know the way, but I had to use the GPS after several turns to "go the quickest route". He refused to believe thirty years had made much of a difference in the state and in his memory.

It was very quiet on this campus. We saw only a handful of students and had no issues parking and wandering around. Tom took us into the new library that he and Madison had toured a year ago. It was quite modern and quite impressive.

 

I looked up the move-in day for NC State and it was that very day, but we saw very little signs of students moving into dorms. The university is very large and very spread out, but still I thought I would see more signs of life.

We headed back to Chapel Hill and picked up Madison for lunch. She regaled us with stories of the activities she had been involved in the night before and that morning. Later she was planning on golfing in the library, dancing in the pit, and taking a party bus to Target for shopping. I could see that trying to cram those activities in with visiting with us was causing her concern so after we dropped off Tom at the airport to fly home I made things easier for her. I told her that Darcy and I could stay the next two nights as planned or the two of us could head off on a little adventure of our own. She agreed that she needed to do the things on campus and find her classes for the next week so we shopped at a mall for a couple of hours and crammed in lots of hugs.

We parked in the lot outside her dorm and hugged and kissed 7564999 times. She would hug her sister and then hug me and then hug her sister and then hug me. We did this for hours until I pushed her in the direction of her dorm, told her to be smart and safe, and to have tons of fun. She waved, blew us kisses, and then turned and walked off. She didn't look back. Darcy and I drove away sniffling. And just like that we were a family of three.

And she is off...

Today we take Madison to college. That statement seems so unreal to type. I just brought her home from the hospital swaddled in the hospital blanket. Yet. I didn't. Somewhere between that day and Thursday eighteen years flew by and my baby is now an adult. She is heading out into the world to forge her way far, far away from her mother family. She will be twelve hours away by car and three hours away by plane. She will sleep in another room in another building, and her bedroom here at home will be empty as I walk through it to say good-night to Darcy.

I have been preparing for this day since my nephew went off to college and I watched my SIL fall apart. It use to drive Madison crazy. "Mom, I'm not leaving for four more years. Stop crying. Stop saying those things!" But I knew that day would be here quickly and it is. For the past two weeks we have been caught up in a whirlwind frenzy of purchases for dorm and college life and it has been easy to ignore the meaning. I kept thinking of how I would clean her bedroom from top to bottom and it would be so spotless. I had this sense of calm. I had prepared my daughter for this time in her life and she would spread her wings and fly.

Then the weekend came and suddenly she and I both stared the inevitable in the face. We had five days together. Four days. Three days. She started sleeping more and stayed curled in her bed until late in the afternoon. Instructions to pack fell on deaf ears. I still had a list of items that weren't checked off, but I felt I needed to do other things like blog or clean. The pile of college purchases sat forlornly in the other room gathering dust, but they made me cry when I passed by them to get to my computer.

On Sunday before I went to bed I knew I would have to be the first to give. I climbed into bed with her and we talked. We talked about her first day home from the hospital. Her first day of school. She talked about firsts she remembered from her childhood. We talked about her fears of college and what she was looking forward to in college. We talked about my fears and my excitement. And then we made plans to finish our shopping the next day.

And we did. It didn't start off well, but with some food and later some Starbucks we completed the clothes portion of the list. The next day we marked off the toiletries. Tuesday I told her to start packing. Nothing. Wednesday came and we went out to lunch and we had haircuts and la, de da. "Madison! You have to start packing up this stuff!"

It started slowly. Darcy and I sat in her room while she went through closets and drawers. We argued some, but I backed off. Let her take what she wants. I worry about the cold, but she is oblivious to that. She will learn. Packing picked up momentum after an hour and suddenly there was more laundry and searches for things. As the mound grew I started panicking that we wouldn't fit it all in the van. I called my friend and she was there instantly with her kids. She called her husband, an architect with a mind that can pack a large amount of stuff into a small space, and he came over and did just that. We went to dinner.

When we got home Madison started another pile of things. I was doing my own packing and getting ready. I could hear Tom talking to Madison giving her his talk which sounded more poop than pep. "You'll be homesick..." Not long after she was crying in her bed her arms wrapped around her two stuffed animals. The ones that have been in her arms since she was one. She is opting to leave them behind so that they don't get hurt. I quietly asked if she needed me and then left her when she said not now. She recovered and became a Tasmanian devil whirling through the house collecting items to add to the new pile. She came in to my room with pillows and tried them all out to decide which ones to take. Later she closed her door and cried some more as she touched the objects she was leaving behind.

She is excited. She is scared. We lay in bed last night and talked some more. We laughed. She reminded me we can Facetime and see each other every day. I thought to myself how that probably wouldn't last long, but I agreed aloud that we could. We hugged and kissed and hugged and kissed some more. I slept well.

 We head out at eleven for the long drive. She is having breakfast this morning with a friend before we leave. Right now she is asleep snuggled in her bed wrapped in her covers. I took her picture. I stare at her as I wander my house. I'm so excited for her. A new adventure. A new beginning. I keep telling myself that.

Florida Botanical Gardens visit

A week after returning from the UK my SIL and my niece flew in to see our pictures and hear all about our trip catch some rays. We had planned this week months ago when I didn't know much about traveling abroad and being gone from home for three weeks. While I had recovered from sleep deprivation I still had tons of office work and chores that needed attention, but since it was summer and nothing was urgent I ignored it and continued my vacation.

We did the usual when we are with the Mason family. We ate. We sunbathed. We ate. We explored new areas. We went out to dinner. Oh, and we ate. My SIL was very helpful in the packing for college list we were making, and had I been ready for that adventure, I would have completed the list while she was here.

Like I always do when in their area, my SIL found something to do that we hadn't done together before. She is coming back from a hysterectomy and walking is one of the ways to improve her strength. She got on an app and decided we needed to walk around the Florida Botanical Gardens one late afternoon before dusk. The girls and I had done that once before during the Gardens' Christmas lights spectacular with my SIL and nephews years ago so I thought it a good idea despite the hot weather.

It turned out to be a nice little outing. The walking area was shaded from several varieties of palm trees and bamboo. We took tons of photos of flowers and read about the different types of species native to the area. We walked through the area where weddings are held, and Madison showed everyone where her senior group had come to take pictures for prom.

The gardens walking path eventually took us through a water area; a pond more than a river. Of course, like all bodies of water in Florida, there were Beware of Alligator signs posted. Having lived here now for over twenty years and having lived on a river, I knew that the deep foghorn sound we were hearing were alligators so I stood still and searched.

Not far from us, hidden under a lily pad was a small alligator, his head and snout just on the surface of the water, his eyes watching us. I had to do a lot of pointing and enlarging of pictures on my phone before Darcy finally saw him, but the others gave up. A young boy and his mother out walking their dog asked me to show them and the boy immediately saw where I was pointing. (That made me think maybe I didn't need eye lasering after all) There was no barrier from the path and the body of water and I wondered if these gators wandered around the gardens at night.

We had purchased a few days before a selfie stick for my niece and so the girls spent a lot of time running through the gardens taking pictures and laughing. I have to say that the $10 purchase was a big hit and gave us hours of enjoyment. We spent a little over an hour at the gardens and then headed off to dinner on the beach. We agreed that pretty soon we were going to have to branch out farther from our cities as we have hit almost every point of interest now during our summer trips together.

But we are okay with doing that too. As long as we are all still traveling together (and the kids still want to be with us) my SIL and I are happy.

Resolution check

I have not checked in on my resolutions on this blog or in my life since the two month check at the beginning of March. I was thinking of Christmas recently and that led to my resolutions, and I realized I didn't even remember them. That has never happened. So I'm checking in to reacquaint myself and to see if I unknowingly kept any.

1. To try something new (whether it be food, an activity, a class, etc.) every two months.- Okay, this is a good one and something that I unknowingly kept. In May I spent a month proctoring IB exams. I took training, worked hand in hand with the coordinator, scheduled proctors, and proctored. Score. And, oh, yes, I will certainly count my trip to the UK as something new two months later! Score: 10
2. To not be so defensive, and to not erupt with anger (yelling) when cornered.  - Well, now isn't this interesting. I've been working on this with my friend because she is a HUGE yeller, although maybe not defensive, and together (reluctantly on her part) we have tried to zen. I think in looking back over the past four months that I have certainly done this despite all the things that have happened that might have been triggers. Score: 8
3. To utilize those damn Wyndham points whether selling points or vacationing myself.  - Uh, well, uh, no. I did well in the beginning, I have had people interested, but it hasn't panned out. Summer is a hard time if you don't book ahead. That's a hard one to score.  Score: 3
4. To lose the weight I put on last year and to get into shape for Europe.  - Oh, how I wished this were true. I wonder if I can ditch it now that my Europe trip is over. Snicker. Snicker. Score: 0
5. I suppose I should work on the language thing again since it seems to bother others. Hmmm...maybe I should voice it as working on the language thing because it isn't necessary as often as I use it. Yes, I like that. - I have done well with this one, thank you kindly. That is another thing I'm working on with my friend so I have to do it too when around her. And being with my MIL in the UK also cleaned up my act. Yep, this one I've done well. Score: 8
6. I also like changing up my wardrobe too. My closet is full of stuff I don't wear but once or twice a year and frankly, I'm bored with it all. But the weight has to come off and the body buffed before I can do that so maybe that should be next year's resolution. Hmmmm.... Ha! Ha! Yay! Yes! I have done this!! I bought new clothes for the UK trip and I recently bought more for summer despite no weight loss.  Score: 10

Total Score: 39 out of 50 (with 2 bonus points) - OMG! Maybe I should have ignored these suckers long ago! I'm really proud now. No wonder I like checking in on these resolutions. Okay, now I have some work to do on a couple issues, but so far not too shabby. Anyone want to take a trip in the US? I can offer you a stay at a nice resort for a good price?

YAG Laser

Nine years ago I had to have cataract surgery. It was a surprise to the eye world because I was so young. It was depressing to me because I was young. In researching the cause of cataracts we discovered that the sun causes it and that people who worked outdoors were susceptible. Ah Ha! My years in the swimming industry were to blame. I wrote about my surgery here, and here, and, because I had to have two separate surgeries, here. Bottom line was I opted for the big bucks procedure that put in Crystalens so that I would not have to use glasses. In the consultation it was mentioned that I would have to "have some laser down the road", but who paid attention to that.

Two years ago my surgeon turned me over to a new doctor for my exams. At the time he brought up the whole laser thing again for "touch up", but the new guy didn't think I needed it last year as I was seeing the chart well. This year when I went in I was not seeing the chart so well. It was blurry. I hadn't noticed any blurriness in my life as I wandered through the day, but in that dark room with that chart under the teeny light I had blurriness and could not read it well. He did his exam and said I had scar tissue. He told me not to worry that my surgeon would zap those babies with the YAG laser and I'd be on my way. He smiled and left the room.

I was taken by another girl to another room where a woman behind a desk scheduled my appointment to have this laser. She said that they wouldn't be able to get it done right away and that because I had to wait they would just do both eyes at the same time. She printed off some paper work, told me this laser thing was "no big deal" and sent me on my way. I worried about it for a couple of weeks. The surgery was scheduled for the day before I headed out to the UK. While the scheduling chick assured me that wasn't a problem, I was sure it was. I had issues after my cataract surgery with infection and eye dryness and I use Restastis especially when flying or driving long distances or sitting under fans.

I worried about the timing of this laser thing and when the office called to tell me they had to reschedule my procedure I believed that divine intervention had occurred and I expelled a huge sigh of relief. The woman calling me was horrified I was waiting so long. I explained I was out of the country and so we rescheduled a couple of weeks after I returned. That happened to be when my SIL was here and I assigned her to be my caregiver. Note to people: Do not assign care-giving roles to people who have fought cancer.

I spent the whole week before the surgery worrying. My caregiver told me to stop whining. I would mention that this procedure was my EYES for heaven's sake and she would come back with, "I had cancer. Did you have chemotherapy, a double mastectomy, and a hysterectomy? No. Stop whining and get me some sun!" I suffered alone. Loudly. I had to go to the office to pay my insurance deductible, and I asked a million questions about this YAG laser procedure which I of course had looked up on the Internet. This chick, like the others, assured me that it was "no big deal". That finally sent me over the edge, and I inquired as to whether she had had the procedure. She looked at me horrified and told me she wasn't that old which just pissed me off more. She told me she had watched it being done. Please. I told her she wasn't reassuring.

The day of the surgery it was pouring down rain. We got there at the required time and we went upstairs to where I had been told to go. We got sent back downstairs where we sat. I made multiple trips to the bathroom because my nerves had finally gotten the better of me. My SIL did not pat my hand. She told me I would be fine and to stop whining. I tried. I didn't listen. We were sitting in front of this older couple. The wife kept telling the husband what to do. Since he had come out of an exam room I thought him the patient, but apparently they were both there for eye appointments because eventually they called her and she disappeared into a room. When she returned several minutes later she had a blue dot over her right eye. My SIL looked at me and said, "If you come back out with those dots over your eyes I am so going to take a picture and put it on Instagram." I have to say that that made me laugh and relaxed me somewhat.

We waited about 45 minutes before they called my name. I went into the examination room and messed some with the tech who felt the need to give me another eye exam. Who cares now what I can read on some chart? Her expressions in regards to my hilarity were great and relaxed me some more. She checked my eye pressure and put a green dot over one eye and a blue dot over the other. I mussed my hair up so that it would cover said dots before being taken back out to join my SIL in the waiting area. She did not take my picture. I went back to the bathroom.

A few minutes later we were taken upstairs. Immediately, they pulled me from my SIL's unloving arms and took me back into the surgery room I vaguely remember from my past surgeries. An older gentleman sat me down and put eye drops into my left eye. Then he took my blood pressure. I mentioned that I was having both eyes done and he pulled up my hair, saw the other dot, checked my chart, and put in drops in that eye. My blood pressure was high and he said that was anxiety. I told him I had a lot of anxiety. He told me it was a simple procedure and I wouldn't feel a thing."

Apparently people think I'm worried about pain. I'm not. Pain is something I can handle. What I was worried about was complications like I had after my last experience. I went almost seven months with an eye infection that made me completely crazy. I was in and out of that eye building more times than I could count. I spent hundreds of dollars on medications for my eye. I saw several different doctors. It wasn't until I finally got to see my surgeon that the problem became manageable, and then I was taking 3 Advil every two hours for days to bring down the inflammation.  It took weekly appointments with him to clear up the eye and maintain the problem. Pain. Pfft. I could handle pain. Blindness? Uh, no.

He led me to a set of chairs where I was reunited with the lady from downstairs. Sans husband. I made a comment about how we were already acquainted, but she was nervous too and just smiled. Then they called her name and she went through a door directly over my left shoulder. The man nurse who had been taking care of me followed her and then yelled back over his shoulder, "I need a catcher!" and this woman came running to stand in the doorway.

Me: "What? A catcher? For what?"
Her: "It's just an expression. It means someone to lead the patient to the chairs over there."
Me: "You might think about changing that if you're going to yell it over the patient. I pictured you catching an eyeball."

And no sooner did those words come out of my mouth then the lady was back in the doorway and being led to another set of chairs. Standing in the doorway was my surgeon and he asked me if I was ready. I followed him and the nurse man followed me. We went through another set of doors into a small room with a piece of equipment that looked like the same thing all eye doctors use when checking your eyes. I sat down on one side and my surgeon sat down on the other. The man nurse gently applied pressure to the back of my head as I put my chin into the cup and then he applied solid pressure to hold my head there. Immediately I said aloud, "Are you afraid I'm going to escape?" My surgeon laughed and told me to blink my eye a few times. Then he said look here and he started shooting me as if I were the bad guy in a video game. Bing, bing. Ping, ping. Boosh, Boosh. It sounded exactly like a video game and the lasers coming at me were red. It was over in mere seconds, my head was released, and my surgeon congratulated me and stood up to leave.

Man Nurse: "Um. Actually, Ms. Boss has both eyes being done."
Me: "So sit back down in that chair because you're not finished yet today." And I lifted up my bangs to show the dot over my right eye.

He laughed. Sat down and we went through the whole process again. I was done in mere seconds and was led back out through the double set of doors. There was no catcher waiting, and so I shouted for one. The same girl came running and she led me to the row of empty chairs where she put drops into my left eye and took its pressure. I reminded her that I had two eyes done, but apparently the pressure in my eye was not where it was suppose to be and so she was flustered and had to ask for help.

This went on and on. The pressure in both my eyes kept going up instead of down. It was suppose to be under 20 and was between 25 and 27. I kept getting drops and then waiting five minutes before being tested again. The more this went on the more anxious I became. I kept trying to ask questions, but Chicken Little was too busy running around the room alerting the other nurses to my eye pressure results I couldn't get a word in. When she mentioned she would soon be in overtime I thought I was going to explode. Eventually she turned me over to someone else who was way more calm. She was the one who explained what the pressure should be. She was the one who told me they would call my surgeon if my pressure didn't go down. Which it didn't. She called my surgeon who ordered more drops of some kind and told me to go home I would be just fine. Hmmmmm...

I whined. The girl told me to go home, lie down with my eyes closed in a dark room, and call them if I needed them. I asked how would I know I needed her. She said a headache. I told her I had one now. She said a "really big headache". I reminded her it was Friday and that no one would be here until Monday. She calmly told me they had an emergency operator that would get my surgeon for me. Since I remembered that he lived one neighborhood over from me I figured I would hunt him down if necessary, I took my drops, and went out into the waiting room to my caregiver.

I followed instructions. My eyes were diluted for over seven hours so I had blurriness all that time. I slept for four hours. By the time I went to bed that night my eyes were almost back to normal. I didn't have the floaters they said I would have until two days later (that's another story). I have found that my right eye vision isn't as clear as the left eye. My poor right eye. No one wanted to work on that one and now it is like a slow child trying to catch up. I don't see my eye guy until the end of the month, and I'm anxious to read the eye chart because I think I saw better before the laser procedure, but perhaps time is required. The one good thing out of the procedure is that I don't need readers again. I can read close up in any light where before I had to be outdoors. I have just gotten to the point where I have stopped reaching for my glasses on top of my head when I want to read something.

So for any potential YAG laser patients who happen on to this site....the procedure itself is painless and simple. The aftermath isn't bad at all, but I did not carry on with my day like they told me I would be able to. Take the day off. Sleep. Let your eye/eyes recover. As for both eyes done at the same time? Why do they usually only do one eye? Makes me stop and wonder. Good Luck!