A typical Saturday morning

I had several family items to discuss this morning, and since the main two were available, we sat in the living room to begin. We ticked off items one, two, and three, but got hung up on item number four which required information from a password-protected account.

Tom: "I don't have that password."

Me: "You do."

Tom: "I don't know where."

Me: "Okay, I'll go get it."

I went to my messy desk and dug through some papers on top of my file manager. As I did, my back scratcher--an essential utensil in my life--fell behind the desk. Now, my desk is huge and heavy and isn't moveable. Since I needed to keep the family focused, I opted not to climb under the desk to retrieve my back-scratcher. 

Instead, I woke my computer to retrieve the password in a file. Out of two monitors, only one obeyed. The main screen was dark. 

I gave up.

Me: "Forget it. My monitor isn't working, and the file thingy is on that screen, and I don't know how to move it to the other screen. Why are things always so difficult?"

Tom: "Is the light on?"

Me: "No. That's the first thing I checked. I turned it on and off. No light."

Tom: "Is it plugged in?"

Me: "Why wouldn't it be plugged in? I just used the damn thing yesterday. How would it come unplugged?"

Tom: "Things happen."

However, he got up and came into the office to assess the situation. Madison, seeing her chance, disappeared. 

Me: "Before we start, I know my desk is a mess, so don't start in on that."

Tom: "I didn't do that."

Me: "No, but you always do that, so I'm nipping it in the bud first."

He messed around with the cord, unplugging from the screen and plugging it back in. He got down on his knees and tried to find the cable behind the desk. There is only one portal in which you can get behind the desk. I have that blocked with a paper shredder, which he didn't move. He assumed he had no access, and annoyed, he got back up and leaned over the desk to peer behind it.

Tom: "I can't even get to the power strip."

Me: "That's because you didn't move the shredder. Let me go under the desk to get it. I have to get my back-scratcher that fell there too."

Tom: "This desk is a mess."

Me: "I told you not to start with that."

Tom: "I'm just getting it out of the way. Plus, I have to move all this shit to so that I can work."

We stopped to yip and yap at one another about desk cleanliness. That ended when I threatened to go into his desk to point out his issues. He went back to working on getting the cord, and I started cleaning. 

Me: "What happened to that grabber thing of my mom's? I used to use that in situations like this, but you did something with it. Did you throw it away?"

Tom: "It's in the garage somewhere."

Another time out as we went back and forth until Tom located the grabber by his desk. He unplugged the monitor, took it off my desk and carried it to Madison's desk.

Tom: "The next thing is to plug it into another outlet. But I can't do that here because this desk is a mess! All these desks are full of shit."

He said this while spinning in a circle between the three desks, monitor in both hands. I may or may not have chuckled.

Eventually, he succeeded with his plan, and the monitor came on.

Tom: "See that light? That's the light I was talking about."

Me: "Yes, I knew what light you meant. It didn't come on."

Tom: "It's on now."

Me: "I see that. But it wasn't on when you tried it either while sitting on my desk."

Tom: "Is the power strip on?"

Me: "Why would it be off? You saw how hard it is to get to it. How would it turn off? You think the back-scratcher did that on its way to the ground when it fell?"

Yup, folks. That is precisely what happened! And I could not stop laughing.

But I did, and then Tom discovered he had the password all along--in his phone. But that wasn't until after we broke into email accounts to okay the usage of the password manager to even find the password we wanted.

Which he had the entire time.

And my friend wonders why I can't leave the house on time!