Okay, he's funny

Our recent weeknight:

Husband arrives long past regular working hours. He begins his routine, turning on his office light to deposit his stuff before moving into the kitchen to drop off his keys. On goes the kitchen light. 

Me: "Turn off the office light."

I'm ignored. He's taken to ordering premade protein meals from his workout facility. One goes into the microwave before he heads toward the bedroom, turning on the hall light so he can see. Because there is only one switch, he does not backtrack after flipping on the bedroom light.

Me: "Turn off the light!"

He's in the bedroom for several minutes, loving on his dog and changing out of his work clothes. Meanwhile, the microwave beeps. 

Microwave: "I'm finished. Beep. Come get me. Beep. Your food is hot now. Beep. Hello? Beep. Beep. Beep."

It drives me nuts.

Me: "Your food is done! And turn off the lights!"

Out, he appears with the dog. Both the bedroom and hallway lights are still on.

Me: "No wonder our bill is high every month! You don't shut off any lights."

Him: "I need to see."

They disappear into the dark outdoors. Depending on the dog's mood, they're outside for seconds or minutes. Tom stands with the door open.

Me: "Shut the door, the mosquitoes are coming in."

Microwave: "Beep. Hello? Your food is cold. Beep. Now you have to turn me on again. Beep. What a waste of electricity. Beep. Beep. Beep."

They return. Elliot drinks water, eats treats, and returns to his brightly lit cave. Tom finishes getting his food and comes out into the living room.

Me: "Arg. You left the kitchen light on. And turn off the hall light!"

Him: "Alexa! Turn off the whining. Please!"