Flashback Friday - substituting

From the archives - September 20, 2004

One of the jobs I do during the year is to substitute teach for a small school for children ranging in age from three years to fourteen years. Most of the time I am in the pre-primary/kindergarten classes. This is where I found myself this morning. I was called in at 7:30 a.m. It was a beautiful day with sunny skies and cooler temperatures than normal. Despite it being Monday, the children were eager to work, and the morning progressed smoothly.

After lunch, I was assigned to rest time for three of the children who are young three year olds. These three apparently require actual sleep or they are unable to make it through the rest of the day. They are brought inside early while the rest of the class goes to "specials" such as library, art, etc. These three get to relax on cots while teachers read books and lure them into Slumberland. Today, I got that job.

Last week when I subbed, I was assigned this task, and I failed. I could not get these three children to sleep. Actually, I didn't understand that they were to sleep. I read tons of books, and we discussed them and had meaningful conversations that one can only have with three year old children. It wasn't until the head teacher came in with the rest of the students for their rest time that I understood these three were to have already been put out. I got this by the horrible shriek she gave upon seeing my three charges awake. It was terrible. I'm lucky I still have a job.

Today, I was informed by her that these three must be put to SLEEP. I was told to read one book, rub their backs, and speak softly to them. Gotcha. I did just that. I got them situated with their blankies and their stuffed animals. I read the book. I rubbed their backs and soothed them with gently, inane conversation. Yep. NO ONE WENT TO SLEEP.

One girl kept sitting up and crying," I want my Mommy." Another one kept tossing her green, stuffed giraffe into the air and trying to catch it with her feet. Although, each child yawned and rubbed his eyes, they were determined to stay awake. They were determined to see me fail. I felt my motherly instincts trying hard to kick in, and I had to work hard to suppress them because screaming, "Close your eyes and get to sleep right NOW!" was somehow not in the substitute teaching manual.

When my children were nappers, I had a system. I started it with my first daughter under the suggestion of her pediatrician. I would nurse her, or give her lunch, depending on the age at the time, take off her shoes, and put her down. I would darken the room and turn on her soft music. I would rub her back, and love her gently for a few moments, and then I LEFT THE ROOM. She put herself to sleep. It was not my job to see that she slept. My job was to leave her the hell alone so she could have her time while I had my time. It worked great.

These three children are not alone. They are spaced about three feet apart from each other. They are in a room with interesting pieces of work, listening to other children outside on the playground. They would rather make faces at each other, and whisper interesting tidbits back and forth. Frankly, I felt that if they couldn't make it through the rest of the day without sleeping then maybe they shouldn't be full time students. But then, that is why I am a S-U-B-S-T-I-T-U-T-E. I am not paid for my, albeit wonderful, opinions.

So I failed yet again. I have to give the head teacher some credit this time for not shrieking when she came inside with the other children. She smiled and thanked me for coming (I only work until 1:00 because I teach swimming at 2:00, but that is another story) and then showed me the door.

Note to self: Visit the classroom and silently observe the real teacher in action. Not sure I believe that she truly accomplishes this sleeping chore without sneaking in sleeping pills.

Update 2017 - I ended up working as a substitute in that classroom quite a bit as they had a teacher rotation issue, but I only got one child to fall asleep. I never conquered all three of those kids. I never conquered any of the others either, and wished I had written about those experiences because they about destroyed me. Worst part of the job. I am very thankful that my kids were able to come home for their nap times. I am very thankful for teachers who are able to put these kids to sleep. I am thankful that this is, and wasn't, my full time job.