I was catching up with my cousin Jaimee's blog and read this entry about a visit to her son's school. Jaimee, if readers remember, had a surprise pregnancy years after tying her tubes and closing up shop after three kids. Those kids were heading toward their teens and were as shocked as their parents. Surprise!
It all worked out better than they expected. Little Nolan has five parents who love, cherish, and boss him around. Recently, Jaimee quit her job where she drove twice a day to another city two hours away with little Nolan in the backseat. The results of this change closer to home meant putting Nolan in a preschool, and her blog post had to do with a special event at Nolan's preschool. A circus. Jaimee took off of work for a couple of hours to attend, and when it was all finished, Nolan thought he was going home.
He wasn't.
Reading this, my heart broke. Nolan had a meltdown and kept letting his mother know that he loved her as if this would change the outcome. Aww... It made me wish I lived near them so that I could've been there and whisked him home with me. Because as a SAHM, I got to do just that.
We had special events at school and if my kids wanted to end their day right then and there? They did. We went home. (Okay, full disclosure, my kids would probably argue with that since school importance was drilled into me via my mother, but I'm mainly referring to Nolan's age. Although they also got to leave in their later years if the teacher agreed, although I know they will roll their eyes at that.) And I loved knowing that if they wanted or needed to come home, they could. Without stress for either of us.
I felt Jaimee's anguish. I can remember that very feeling when we were deciding if I would return to my job after my maternity leave. It wasn't an easy decision, especially for me. Nor was it easy after the decision had been made for me to stay home. I loved my job. I had been offered a promotion. I was damn good at what I did. Not only did I save lives, but I also taught children and adults how to swim and how to protect themselves, and I trained and molded other lifeguards. It was hard to walk away. I lost a piece of myself when I did.
But Tom and I decided this was best for our family and I've never regretted it for a minute. I was born to be a SAHM. I genuinely believe that, but in saying it, I have to also give HUGE credit to Tom. Because he's the one who made it possible all these years.
He sacrificed. He didn't get to sleep later or take a nap. Tom didn't get to attend every school event (although he was at most of them) or every sporting event, and he was the one who shouldered job stress and had fewer hours of cherub smiles. Like Jaimee, who had to walk away from a crying child begging for him to stay, we couldn't have done this without Daddy Tom.
Now that our nest is empty and my husband is at retirement age, I'm sure he envisioned I'd venture out into the workforce. Probably I too envisioned that back when we made the SAHM decision, but neither of us knew the future, and so he still gets up every day and heads off to his job while I putter around the empty house and have time to read other people's blogs.
Hmm...maybe I should offer myself up as Jaimee's nanny.
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