Tuesday, September 29, 2015

Worst grade I've had in years

When I finished drafting my fantasy football team, and understand that I hand NO idea what I was doing other than picking guys I believe in, immediately the site gave me a grade of a D+. On the right hand side I had to look at this gigantic red D+ every time I loaded my page. If I clicked on it I went to a page that gave me a run down on everything I did wrong in picking the players that I picked. Other than not selecting a kicker or a defense (I have since rectified that) I didn't think my choice of players was terrible.

I feel I know football. I know which players are good and which ones might be good and which ones to stay away from. I feel I'm a good judge when it comes to the NFL. I know stats and players and coaches names. I can go into a sports restaurant and name most of the players covering the walls even if they played ten, twenty years ago. Why players names come to me when the list of items Madison needs me to send her can't is beyond me. I just like football.

Seeing that damn D+ really annoyed me. My report card said, "Well, a bad draft position led to an even worse draft. Picking seventh overall, Cara's Team is projected to land in 10th place in Yahoo...League with a record of 1-13-0 (14,000 points)". What were they basing that on? How can they know that? So I read on and under a title "Good Luck With That One" in bold lettering it said, "Cara's Team will have some intriguing decisions to make each week at WR, with a narrow projected points difference between their third (Larry Fitzgerald), fourth (Pierre Garcon), and fifth-ranked (Mike Wallace) wideouts."

Every other player in my league received a B or a B+ except one other person who was graded a C. Heck, even during the selection process when I didn't really understand what was happening some yokel typed in some derogatory comment that I was sure was directed at me. Okay, people, whatever, I didn't realize that when I hit the JOIN button I was seriously joining at that very moment and would never be able to get out of it. How about a little friendly compassion?

Then football started and they paired me against another person in the league on some side bet thing that I still don't really understand with a prediction of a huge loss. Other than my quarterback, Ben Roethlisberger, I didn't score so well and that D+ continued to haunt me. By week two I figured out how to change out my players. I knew how to play certain ones and how to bench others. I felt very secure in my team for week two when the games started despite another terrible prediction and a predicted score of 60 something.

Boy, did that letter grader have to eat his words after week two. Not only did I score 113.46 points for the week, but I took first place in my league. My third pick of Larry Fitzgerald who everyone thought was too old and too weak and too slow scored three touchdowns and netted me my second highest score of the day at 29.20. Suddenly now the tune had changed. "cmkerwin Team (I changed my name too) put on a show in this matchup, registering the highest point total this week to demolish Sierra's Team 113.45 to 57.72. This was a legendary rout, with the 55.74 point margin of victory being the highest recorded in the league this season."

Suck it teacher with the red text color keyboard!

Of course, now I've lost Ben for six weeks or more so I'm not getting cocky, but still I think my team is better than a D+. We are going to be the little team that sneaks right up the ladder, just like the Steelers with our back-up quarterback Michael Vick! And next year I'll play in the DraftsKing! (Kidding!)

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