5 things to start the week

1. Darcy's date went well.  His two little brothers accompanied them to the movies, and, despite being told to sit elsewhere, sat with them.  After the movie they got ice cream...with his family. My friend, Sharon, who was present at Darcy's birth..."I delivered her"...read the blog entry and immediately called to ask, "What the hell do you mean you let Darcy go on a date with a boy?" She and Kelly are having just as much trouble with my baby growing up. Maybe more so. 
2. Apparently Blogger has messed with updated their site, and now I find that I must not hit the space bar twice like I was taught by Miss Irma Jean Rodgers in typing class. This new fangled technology doesn't require two spaces, and if I forget, having had it drilled into me for so many years, then my page is uneven in the margins and my OCD kicks in. I have to keep editing and it is driving me crazy. I should have listened when my children tried to tell me that they only single space after a period in their school reports.  Pfft.  This "new typing"...
3. I don't like to be called ma'am.  It makes me feel old.  When I first moved to Florida I was "Miss Cara" at work.  I've tried to keep that moniker ever since.  Even when I substituted in school I asked not to be called Mrs. because it made me look for my mother-in-law.  Now I'm a ma'am.  Darcy's new beau refers to me as that every time he answers one of my questions.  Today on the phone I was ma'am.  It has got to stop.  Turning fifty this year is bad enough.  I'm working on finding a better expression.
4. Tis the season for my annual blood check and mammogram. So far I've put it off past the 30 days written on the script.  I feel like I'm defying my doctor, but as she patted me on the head when I mentioned this, she said, "I can only suggest and write scripts. I can't drive you there and force you inside.  It is your health." The old, "The only person it hurts is you" saying from my youth.  It didn't work then, but it must be working now because I called today and scheduled my mammogram and then went out and bought some fish oil pills.
5. A week off from school and 5:30 a.m. wake up calls was great, but getting back into the routine is not. My body does not want to cooperate, and I had a fitful-less-than-three hours of sleep last night. Which means that I will need a nap later in the day.  Which means I won't want to sleep tonight. Which means another fitful-less-than-three hours of sleep. I don't chalk this up to old age, however. I've always been a late nighter/late sleeper.  Which I believes proves that I'm not old because doesn't that change as you get older? Early to bed? Early to rise? I'll have to survey some "ma'ams" to get that answer. 

Ribbett...

Me (handing toothbrush over the shower curtain):  "Can you put this away inside the frog?"

The toothbrush is removed from my hand and I hear a clink as it is deposited, not inside the frog, but into the cup that his toothbrush, his razor, and his toenail scissors reside.

Me (peering around the shower curtain just to make sure what I heard was correct):  "I said inside the frog, not that gross cup."

Tom:  "I thought maybe you had lost your mind.  A frog?  You want your toothbrush inside a frog?"

Me:  "Yes, that thing hanging on the wall.  The frog."

Tom:  "I thought that was a hippo."

Me:  "Seriously?  You really thought I meant a real frog, yet had I said hippo you would have hung it there?"

Tom:  "It doesn't look like a frog.  It looks like a hippo.  Or a bear."

Me:  "A green bear?  It's a frog.  And it protects my toothbrush from germs."

Tom:  "If you say so, but I bet there are plenty of germs inside a frog's mouth."

Exploring higher education

College visits with my high school junior are underway.  First of all, today's high school students are on their own.  At least in our area.  The excuse is that the guidance counselors have too many other titles and responsibilities to help out in the guidance part of their job that might include helping students get to college. Or get scholarships.  All of this now falls on the student's shoulders, which in my daughter's case falls on my shoulders because she is too darn busy with her IB responsibilities which include tons of essays and projects. I'm just glad that I realized this early, and that I have a good friend who keeps me informed.

Secondly, high school students are granted only three days of excused absences to visit colleges, which means this must be done on the weekends, over breaks, and during the summer months.  All before she begins applying after August 1st.  While she is working on her IB Extended Essay that is due the first day of senior year.  Holy pressure!

I would love to talk about our college visitation experiences, but do not want put things out there that might jeopardize her getting into a college.  How crazy is that?  Welcome to the world of social media.  I will say, and this is because when things are done right I believe in honoring an institution, that so far the best college open house experience that we have had is a private school in Ft. Lauderdale; Nova Southeastern University.

From the outstanding student dinner that we attended the night prior to the next day's open house, this university was first class all the way.  We talked to recruiters, admission staff, professors, deans, library staff, and the college president.  We were informed on applications, the financial aid process, and scholarships. We toured the campus, the dorms, the student center, the library, and tasted the food.  Every questions we had was answered.  If the person we were talking to didn't know the answer, he got someone who did right then and there.

It was our first college visitation and as one professor told me, "we set the bar high".  Who knew she would be so right?  I thought all of our experiences would be just this good.  I thought these institutions would be rolling out the red carpet to woo these students, to pull them in.  So far that hasn't been the case.  I have had one recruiter answer my question with the response, "Go to our website.  It is all on there."  I have been to a college where I met zero professors.  I have been on a tour that showed me only around the outside of the campus, as if they had something to hide in the inside.

So far we have only toured Florida universities and colleges which I have to say are beautiful.  There is nothing like a Florida campus.  I can remember driving around the University of Florida when we were visiting Florida on one of my brother's golf tours and thinking, "Why didn't I come to Florida and go to school?"  The palm trees and the sun were definitely draws for a Hoosier girl coming from a landscape of darkness and snow.

My daughter is nonchalant.  Or scared.  Or excited.  Or a mixture of all of that.  She has another year of high school and doesn't get the fuss, especially since she has a huge amount of IB requirements that still must be met.  I feel that I'm pushing.  She feels that I'm pushing.  I try to step back, but doing so sets us back. Registrations fill up.  Hotels fill up.  It is a daunting experience for all of us, yet also exciting.  The world is so big and waiting for my little one to embrace, to explore, to conquer.  How we get there doesn't really matter, but the institution does and so we continue on with visitations.  Hoping for the that one campus that speaks to her, to us, where we feel she can enjoy, succeed, learn.

Letting go

Today I watched my younger daughter walk out the door with a boy for her first date.  It took everything I had not to grab her arm and pull her back.  To hold her in my arms and shout at the kid to go away.  To tell him that she is my baby.  That she is too young for this nonsense.  That he has no right.  But instead I smiled, greeted him, kissed her, and let her go.

She told me about him a month ago.  We talked about the feelings you get inside when you see that certain someone.  I think a part of me felt it wouldn't go farther.  But it did.  First it was a group get together.  Then it was meeting at a school event.  Then it went to "dating" as my daughter called i,t which meant he asked her to be his girlfriend and she said yes.  Then came the hand holding.  Then he began to come to her sporting events to cheer her on, and we met him and then his parents.  It was inevitable that the date would come next.

I originally told her no dating her freshman year.  As if I could hold her back and stop the rite of passage. Silly me.  I gave in after meeting him.  He is kind and can hold a conversation with an adult, with me. Without cracking, although I was on my best behavior.  Plus, are you ready for his?  His parents are from the same area of Indiana that I am from.  I mean the guy has got to be okay, right?

Darcy has done well this year in school.  She has stayed focused, done well in a program that we originally thought might not be a fit for her, and has gotten great grades.  She has shown us that she is mature.  We trust her.  So I said yes.  Her father, he said yes right away.  I was the hold out.  She is my baby.  The little girl with the pacifier and the thumb in her mouth that cuddled with me every chance she got.  But being a parent is also letting them sprout wings to move away from the cuddling, to branch out into the world.  And so I said yes, and waved as they walked together toward his parents in the van, away from me.

Connie foot update

As my faithful, kind, followers have seen, I have not been blogging like I should.  Those that follow me on Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter know that I have been busy.  Those that have had no idea have been nice to call to ask the reason.  Since the first of the year my mother has been in and out of the hospital three times, her latest this past week.  The first visit was due to a change in medication which resulted in a five day observation stay, plus a week in a crappy skilled nursing/rehab facility.  The second visit was due to an infection in the foot wound that required surgery, a longer hospital stay in the critical care unit, and a three week stay at a great skilled nursing/rehab facility where she was given medication through a PICC line.  She went home on a Wednesday and was back in the hospital on Friday where she is residing still.

In the past, since the beginning of this foot saga, she has claimed that she had osteomyelitis (OM).  The infectious disease doctors, and various others, have all sort of shrugged because the MRIs that she had done didn't definitively show that to be the case. Apparently, now they have changed their minds.  This group of hospitalists said that the prior MRIs were poor due to movement and ordered a new one.  This time her foot was packed so that she couldn't move it and the results showed OM in the bone that is the cause of her foot wound.  The treatments for that are the PICC line medication or amputation.  Connie chose the first one.

She is on vancomycin through the PICC line for approximately four to six weeks.  She is also taking two oral antibiotics to go along with the vancomycin.  She will head back to the same skilled nursing/rehab facility that she stayed in recently.  It is connected with the hospital, and her hospitalist physician that has worked with her at various times through this almost four year saga will be her doctor there.  She was informed that she would be back in her same room with the same roommate that she had just received a couple of days before she checked out.

The prognosis on this infection is that it will come and go and that they will continue to treat her with the medication as amputation would just cause more problems.  The infection can spread.  Eventually the treatments may become too much and Connie can opt out of them.  At that point the hospital will keep her comfortable.  For now she goes along with the treatment.  It isn't the first time she has done this same treatment.  She did this twice before when the foot wound first happened and she has done it in fewer weeks since that time.  Each treatment has bought her more time so she is hopeful that this one will too.

I shall try not to feel like I must go visit her every day.  She is thirty minutes from me and visiting cuts into my day.  We both agree that we have to be more reasonable when it comes to this.  I have to continue on with my life and she has to work on getting healthy. Which means more blogging and more foot photos to come! Thanks for your loyalty, dear readers.

Two month 2014 resolution check

I'm a tad late on this, but better late then never, huh?

1. To take control of my life both physically and mentally so that I am a happy, healthy person by the time I turn 50.  It is interesting that I have forgotten most of these resolutions these past two months save for this one.  I have controlled the mental part well, but the physical side of things seems to be going downhill.  I suppose that means I should give myself half in the points department.  Score:  5
2. To treat my blogging as a job so that I am writing more than the previous year.  As we all know, this resolution has not been kept.  Score:  0
3. To purchase a new wardrobe and get rid of items that I have held on to for way too many years.  I'm not sure that this resolution is one that can be done in little spurts unless I throw out something each month.  Which is an easy solution now that I think about it.  My thinking in making this resolution was that I would drop tons of weight, buff up, and have to buy all new fitting clothes.  But that it wouldn't happen until the end of the year.  That being said, I have become quite depressed with my wardrobe and have thought daily about changing parts of it.  That should count for something. Score:  3
4. To assist in the college process as needed.  Oh, yes.  This one has been done in spades.  Madison is registered on sites.  We have toured two three colleges.  She is signed up for the ACT and the SAT.  Bam!  Score:  10
5. To seriously change my language so that the "naughty" words are used less.  Yes, this is one I've worked on for years, but if I'm going to take control this one should be controlled as well. Hmmm....I can honestly say that I had no memory of making this resolution.  Despite that fact, I can also say that since Darcy has acquired a "boyfriend" who is, in Darcy's words, "A good Christian boy", I have toned down the language.  In fact the only time that my language got a tad "naughty" was when I was with my niece in IN, which I found weird since she hates it when I talk like that.  That should probably be dealt with in therapy if I ever go back.  Score:  7

Total (out of 50):  25 Hey, half the points this early in the game? Go Cara! Go Cara!

But I do care about time

My flight from Florida left at 5:55 am. Which seemed reasonable when I booked it. After all I rise at 5:30 during the weekday. I forgot about the time change. As I was walking down the street one day...

I was finally packed and ready to crawl into bed at 1:00 am, but had to spring forward my clock so that I could get in the right time zone in order to get to the airport on time. I got up at 4:10 and left the house at 4:30 which meant I got a total of three hours of sleep. My seat mate on the plane lamented the fact that he had forgotten about the time change. I asked him, "Does anybody know what time it is?"

The first leg of my journey to Indiana for my Aunt's funeral stopped in Chicago where I had a two hour layover. We landed at 8:25 am by my watch sprung forward, but Chicago is an hour behind Florida, thus it was only 7:25 am. My next flight left at 9:45 am Chicago time for an hour flight to Indianapolis, but Indy is an hour ahead of Chicago and so I would arrive at 11:49 am. Which was 10:49 am yesterday. Does anybody really care about time?

What it really meant when I sat down to mull it all over was that I got very little sleep, jumped in and out of time zones, and still managed to find my way despite the confusion. Though I can't imagine why (oh no)...

Everywhere I went people were commenting on the time change and the forgetfulness of the time change and all of it made me think of Chicago's (the group not the city) song about time. Because we all have time enough to cry (or die)...

And it all just seemed fitting. 

Aunt Lorene

Thursday my Aunt died.  The oldest sibling on my father's side.  Aunt Lorene.  She was 99 years old, and I kept telling myself each time that I saw her that she would hang on until 100.  I always felt like I would know.  The last time I hugged my dad I knew I wouldn't see him again.  I felt that.  I didn't want to believe it, but I felt it.  Each time I left Aunt Lorene I didn't feel it and it brought me peace.  This last month I felt it.  She was on my mind and in my dreams, and I worried.  I told myself it was because I most likely wouldn't see her this summer that I felt this way.  I told myself she would make it to 100 years, and I would make sure to come for that milestone.  But I think I knew.

Rusty, Cara, Connie, Russ, Grandma Mason, Grandpa Mason, Aunt Lorene

Both my grandmothers died before I really got to know them; my mother's mother when I was one and my father's mother when I was seven.  The only real "grandmothers" that I had on either side were aunts; Aunt Helen and Aunt Lorene.

Jo and Aunt Lorene

Her life wasn't easy.  She was the eldest child and the only girl in a family of four.  She helped raise her three brothers.  She married young, and while the marriage was hard she stayed, raising three boys of her own.  She left a good job, one she loved, to come home to care for her mother when she was dying.  She wondered aloud to me several times how different her life might have been if she hadn't come back.  "But I don't regret it," she said.  

Aunt Lorene was "grandmother" to many children.  She didn't care if they were related to her or not, if they needed a place or a hug or food she was there.  She was a mother and a mentor.  My brother and I stayed with Aunt Lorene when my parents had to travel.  We stayed in the front bedroom of her house, and she didn't care when we discovered that the closet in that room led into the closet into her room; a great secret hideaway to us.  She let us rummage around in there, pushing aside her dresses to enter and exit from either side.  While my Uncle Leo was the disciplinarian, Aunt Lorene pretty much gave us free rein to play.

She took care of her father when he couldn't be alone anymore, moving him into her house.  "It was just what was expected," she told me.  She worked with her husband selling farm supplies from her garage.  She would be in the kitchen cooking when someone would drive up, and out she would go to complete a sale before returning to the food on the stove.  She gardened.  She took care of the animals on the farm.  She worked later in a corner store that the family owned.  I can remember stopping there with my dad on the way to the farm and she would be asleep standing up when we entered.  My dad loved to catch her napping while on the job.  "Are you sleeping or reading your eye lids?" he would shout at her, causing her to jump.  She never scolded him.  She loved her little brother too much for that.  "Oh, I'm just resting my eyes," she would say in her slow drawl.

 

Family and church were important to her.  She taught us Sunday school, teaching us songs and Bible stories while we colored pictures that she would later hang around the room.  She cleaned the church and made sure that it stayed open even as people migrated to bigger churches and congregations.  She took it upon herself to bring the family together at holidays and reunions.  Thanksgiving was always at Aunt Lorene's after our grandparents died with the women in the kitchen, the men hunting, and the kids playing the many board games she kept in a cabinet in an end table.

Christmas Eve was at the farm.  Everyone would gather and eat and open presents.  Aunt Lorene always made sure everyone had something to open.  She did the shopping for our grandfather and for herself.  My favorite present ever came from my grandfather.  It was a barrette with my name engraved on it.  I still have it to this day because back then Cara was never found on any item, and I thought it the greatest thing ever.  It wasn't until years later that I realized my Aunt was the one who took care of getting me that.

Aunt Lorene came to my graduations.  She came to my wedding.  She made sure that she was there for me in things that mattered, always bringing me a homemade angel food cake that she swore was my favorite, even though I hated angel food cake.  She loved to kiss us and hug us and smother us with love, and we always squirmed and protested and wiped off her kisses.  But secretly we felt loved.

She loved to cook for everyone.  In her better days she made delicious noodles that the kids couldn't get enough of.  Her pies were always sweet and her meringue peak perfect.  She fried chicken for the family reunion every year up until this past reunion when her kids demanded she stop as she could barely stand due to back pain and a fractured hip.  I can remember many a reunion waking up to the smell of frying chicken at 5 o'clock in the morning.  "I have to get this fried so that I can go to church before the reunion," she would say each year.

If you showed up at her house for any reason, you were fed.  "Sit down and I'll make you some eggs and bacon and gravy and biscuits," she would tell you.  She was happiest when she could feed you, and she worried when you refused.  I spent many hours sitting at her round table watching her cook, telling her stories, and eating.  When I began going each summer to stay with her at our reunion time it was Darcy who would get up with Aunt Lorene and sit at the table, watching her cook and telling her about her life.  Life coming full circle for me.

As I got older, I got more curious about her life.  She outlived her parents, her brothers, and one son.  I made her tell me stories about when she was young and lived on the farm.  I was fascinated about she had to see "beaus" in the front room of the house and how they were never suppose to be alone with one another.  I wish I had recorded those conversations.  We talked about doing so, but never did, and of course I regret that as my own mind isn't so sharp anymore either.

After her son died, she wondered why she was still alive.  She said no one should have to bury her child.  She would have liked to have given her life to spare her son.  She felt she had lived a good life, been faithful, loved as often as she could.  She was content in her belief that this wasn't the end. She said she would continue on until "the good lord takes me".  I was hoping it would have been later, but I couldn't have asked for a better grandmother figure.  She will be missed by many.

Stetson is Elliot's first choice

Each day we receive college information in the mail for Madison, and sometimes Darcy since she too took the PSAT this year.  The amount of money that is spent on these mailings makes me crazy most of the time, and in the beginning I tried to make an effort to peruse all of them.  That lasted about one month. Now I am more selective in what goes into the "keep" pile and what goes into the trash.  In other words, you better WOW me in some way because now the girls and I read aloud the mailings and determine which pile these mailings will fall.

One of the universities that has sent us information that I we find helpful is Stetson University.  So far everything they have mailed us has been full of interesting tidbits, helpful websites, and good information overall.  We are heading over to visit the campus later this month and so we recently received a nice packet of information pertaining to that visit.  Inside was a card that listed the Top 10 reasons to choose Stetson University.  A great piece to read aloud, which I did.  Number 10 was Starbucks and it said, "You read this one first, didn't you?  That's okay, our students love it, too.  Come visit the campus and we'll buy you a cup in our new coffee shop in the student union.  Visiting a college campus is your best opportunity to sense if it's the right one for you---we hope you'll stop by so we can get to know you better."  I was sold already.

Number 4 was Pet-friendly Residence Halls and said, "Yes, you read it right: bring your furry pal to live with you (as long as s/he is under 50 pounds and friendly)!  This is one reason why Stetson will feel like home in no time."  I looked down at Elliot, who was standing in front of me thinking I was looking at a food item since I was standing in the kitchen.  "Guess who is going to college with Madison?" I shouted.  "And then I can get my little dachshund!"  (Side note:  I follow several dachshunds on Vine and have fallen in love. I keep talking about my dachshund that I'm going to get whenever Elliot refuses to snuggle with me, whenever he annoys me, whenever the kids refuse to care for him...pretty much all the time.)  Elliot didn't seem concerned or excited in any way and so we finished up the top 10 list and added it to the "keep" pile and moved on with the rest of our after school life.

About an hour later while I was in the living room talking with Madison about things I heard the dog in the trash can.  When Elliot is bored, and when the girls forget to shut the trashcan in the kitchen, Elliot sticks his nose into the can and goes fishing.  He tries to be quiet, but I'm a mother and rarely does this get past me.  I shouted at him to get out of the trash, and Madison jumped up to handle the situation.  When she went into the kitchen she found that he had pulled from the trashcan one of the mailings from a school that had not made the cut.  He was happily using his paws and teeth to shred the mailing into tiny little pieces all over my kitchen floor.

"I think Elliot is telling us that Stetson is his choice," Madison shouted from the kitchen.  "He certainly isn't voting for (Insert whatever school it was) and he is obviously making sure we aren't considering it either."

Connie Foot Update

I haven't given an update yet this year on Connie's foot because one, it was closed, and two, she started the year out in the hospital.  The foot wound closed back in October and we trekked to see the Foot God every two weeks to have him cut off dead skin and any built up scabbing.  By the beginning of December he decided we only needed to come once a month.  The next scheduled appointment was in the first week of the new year, but because Connie was in the hospital due to a medication change, she missed that appointment.  By the time she got out of rehab and the nursing facility and over her bronchitis it had been two months since we had seen the Foot God.  I was having withdrawals.

We were to see him last Wednesday, but when I got to my mother's house she was in trouble.  She was out of it, burning with a high fever, septic, and unable to really move.  The paramedics were called and she spent seven hours in the ER while they worked to get her stabilized.  She had an infection in the body, but no one knew where.  I did.  I asked for the Foot God to be called.  The attending doctor, who was the original doctor when this foot wound began, agreed to call his office telling me, "He likely won't come, but someone in his office will."  I looked at the man and said, "He will come."

And he did.  He arrived after Connie had been moved into the critical care unit.  He was bent over a computer reading up on Connie's case when I came back with her suitcase.  Without thinking, I leaned over and hugged him from behind.  "Oh, a familiar face.  I knew you would come!"  He turned red, laughed, straightened up and said, "How's it going?"  And I knew everything would be better.  He listened to everything, told me he knew something was wrong when we didn't show up for the appointment that day, and went in to check the foot.  Connie was completely out of it and unaware as he unwrapped it, poked on it, and declared it full of fluid.  I asked him if this could be the source of infection and the reason for what was happening and he said it could be.  And then he just did the surgery right there in the room, much to the horror of the nurse.  She cringed through most of it and couldn't believe Connie wasn't moving.  The Foot God told the nurse Connie was neuropathic and continued to cut away on the foot.  She went from this:

To this:

He asked for my assistance after the surgery as the nurse had disappeared.  I wasn't wearing my scrubs, but I held up Connie's foot while he bandaged it.  We both agreed I could work for him, being an expert now in foot wound care.  He patted me and told me he would be back on Friday.

The culture he did on the wound came back as the source of infection.  She had a pulmonologist, an attending doctor, a foot doctor, and an infectious disease doctor on the case.  They put in a PICC line for IV medications and watched her for six days, before moving her across the street to the skilled nursing and rehab facility.  She was to be on the IV medication until the 5th of March, but after several days of the medication she blew up like a balloon in her thighs and hands.  The medications was stopped and we are still waiting on word from the doctor.  The swelling eventually took two days to leak out of her (from any wound holes) and she was quite the little puddle from that.  Despite that, the bone on bone hip, and the recently diagnosed spinal stenosis she is rehabbing and trying to go with the flow.  She developed another nasty skin tear the morning of her next appointment with the Foot God, and as I wheeled her out of the nursing facility to head to the car to take her to the appointment, the nurse assured me they would fix that up when we got back.  I told her not to bother that the Foot God would take care of it.

And he did.  He got out the suture kit and went to work on it.  By the time she was finished at that appointment she looked like a mummy from the knees down.  The foot wound "looked better" and we see him again in another week.

And the saga continues...

My feelings on The Wells Report

Once the NFL ends I usually don't blog about sports, which I find odd since I am a sports fan of a variety of different sports.  I have an ESPN app and a Yahoo Sports app on my phone and Ipad, and I receive sports updates daily through them.  Lately, I've been receiving the Olympic coverage that has allowed me have a lot of fun with my husband at night when we watch the delayed coverage.  Friday the NFL Wells Report on the investigation into the Miami Dolphins bullying incident was released.  My app let me know that it was online, and later in the evening when I had some time I read the report.  All 144 pages of it.  It was sickening.  Not only was Johnathan Martin bullied by his Dolphins teammate Richie Incognito, but also by two other teammates and a coach.  And it turns out, he wasn't the only one bullied.  The report also found that these four guys bullied another teammate, who was not named, and a Dolphins employee.

The report is horrific. It doesn't hold anything back and is complete with quotes, text messages, and tweets. The language is brutal.  The bullying disgusting.  The racial and homophobic mentality sickening.  These guys taunted Martin with gestures and words, and used his mother and sister in their cruelty.  I felt ill after reading the report and took a long shower just to try to feel clean.  The fact that there are people in this world out there that are capable of thinking these things, that are capable of doing these things, that are capable of pushing these thoughts and actions on to others is the reason why I vote against party lines.  While there are many political topics and subjects to address and pass through Congress I don't believe we can succeed as a nation, as a whole, until every individual, regardless of race, sex, religion, nationality, and sexual orientation, has the same rights and respect that we all deserve as human beings.  No one, no party, no group, no government, and no person, should have the right to dictate over and interfere into anyone's personal and private life.  Until we can all realize this simple truth we will never be able to work together, to come together, as a nation.

So far not much has happened in the repercussion of this report.  The Dolphins have fired a long time trainer and fired the Offensive Line coach who was named as one of the bullies.  Nothing has happened with the players involved.  Nothing has happened with the Dolphins head coach, Joe Philbin, who the report claimed was unaware of any of the activity. Which is an issue in itself. How, as a head coach, are you unaware of this type of behavior?  He should be fired for that alone.  Shouldn't head coaches know what the hell is happening in their locker rooms?  And maybe he did really know it was happening, which then means he should be fired for not stopping it.  

The NFL has got to stand up and take a hard stance with this report. Several Dolphins players have already pooh poohed the report and dismissed Ted Wells, the attorney who led the investigation. Other players have made remarks and told stories about their first year hazing experiences, shrugging as if to say, "We got through it. No big deal."  I, for one, am tired of the whole "This is sports.  This is football.  It happens" script. Why does it happen? Why has it been allowed? As we have evolved over the years why haven't these players put their foot down and said, "Really? Aren't we a little old for this kind of crap?" I never experienced that behavior when I played sports. It hasn't happened throughout my daughters' sports experiences, including high school athletics.  Don't tell me it is "men being men" because those guys? Those weren't men. Those were nasty, sick individuals that got off on preying on those who they felt were weak. Those guys were bullies, plain and simple, and they went far beyond any "freshman hazing" rituals. The NFL players are always preaching, "It's a business," when they are traded or fighting the organization for better salaries. Well, then they need to remember that as well. The NFL is a business, and in any business in this country that behavior is not allowed, and employees are protected by law. 

All of the players in the NFL should be made to read the report. They should think how it would feel if their own children were in Johnathan Martin's shoes. The report talks about what a kind, caring, open hearted person Martin is. The kind of guy who would walk an old lady across the street and help kids learn to read. He was considered weak because of this trait and because he avoided confrontation off the field. Who in their right mind finds that right? I have a child like that, and I'm damn proud of her. She solves issues in other ways, and I don't find that wrong. The fact that there are people out there that find her way wrong? That would harm her because of that? That is what is so scary. 

I think everyone should read the Wells Report. I keep thinking surely if everyone read it those that feel differently from me would be horrified at what they were reading.  But then I was at my daughter's soccer game wearing my Steelers jacket and a parent made a comment about the team.  I looked over at him, this parent whose daughter plays with my own, and saw that he wore a Miami Dolphins hat, and I mentioned that I had read this report.  His response?  "Oh, you mean, the report about guys playing REAL football? And the wimps that couldn't handle REAL football?" And he scoffed.  I told him to read the report and then tell me he still believed that. But the fact that he read any information about this report and still could have that reaction?  Sickening. 

Later, the father who was sitting between the two of us, leaned over to me and put his hand on my arm.  "I believe we can't have that behavior in any business," he said.  "It isn't right in or out of football." It gave me some hope.

Old pics just for fun

In downloading my Iphone pictures to my computer I found these pictures I took of the girls at Christmas time as we left the mall.  Some of them I have posted before, but they were so cute I thought I would post them all together.  Seriously, we should have done this all over the mall and made it into a book.  Wouldn't that have been cute?

5 Tidbits

1. I am enjoying the Winter Olympics, but the commercials and the lateness is causing problems.  I now record (I'm not suppose to use the word "tape" any more) the Olympics each evening and start watching around 9:30 pm. from the beginning.  This way I can fast forward through the ads that don't interest me - and there are MANY - and through the replays of each athlete.  And is that necessary? Every turn is replayed as if we didn't see if the first time.  Drives me nuts!  But, I have the ability to do something about it and I have.  Now if they would just start them an hour earlier!
2. Madison is playing recreation soccer again this season after missing a couple of years.  She is on an under 19 team that practices twice a week and plays games on Saturdays.  It has given her some exercise and is part of her IB CAS requirements for school.  There are four teams at this age group and we have played each other several times.  For the most part we have tied almost every game. This weekend was the big tournament and based on a point system; six points for a win, one point for a shut-out, and three points for a tie.  You got zilch for losing.  We won all three games with two of them shut outs.  We thought we were the champs until we were informed that the two highest teams play each other again in two weeks.  Jeez.  Just when we thought it was ending.
3. My new shows on Netflix are Leverage and Parks and Recreation.  Kelly has tried to get me to watch Parks and Recreation, but I'm not big on sitcoms.  She was right.  Shhh...  The fact that I actually worked for a Parks and Recreation department apparently never crossed my mine, but when I need a good laugh I tune into Netflix and that show.  If only I had worked with nutballs like that group.  What good times I would have had.  Oh.  Wait.  I did work with people like that and I did have good times.  Leverage (and Person of Interest on CBS) has Kelly, the girls, and I all wishing we were in the spy business.  We know we could be good.  We were recently informed that my nephew and his girlfriend will be in Orlando over spring break and we think this might be a good time to work on spying.  We thought two of us could follow them around Disney while two of us entered their hotel room and short sheeted the bed and/or gathered information like one bed or two for the parents.  We just have to find some ear buds for all of us.
4. 'Tis the time of the year when all companies and organizations vote on issues, budgets, etc. for the coming year.  I attended my homeowner's association, they of the "put in new grass" nasty, threatening letter this month with my neighbors.  The board took it upon themselves to hire a management company that would put out our mailings (not our dues mailings, but "any other mailings"), take the minutes of the monthly meetings, and send out the nasty, threatening letters.  That's it.  That's all the management company would do.  In fact it is the exact job of the secretary and the treasurer, one of those jobs that I use to hold in the same organization.  For these three things we will pay the management company - are you ready? - we will pay the management company $10,000 a year!  I stood up and told them I would do it for $8,000 a year and I would through in mailing the dues.  I mean, really.  It made for an interesting meeting as the majority of the homeowners were down right pissed.  So pissed in fact that 3 of the 4 members up for re-election didn't get voted in.  Now we have to reassemble a board.  Hmmm.. Note to self:  send my resume in to them and my bill for $8,000.
5. The girls are off tomorrow from school.  Darcy has an eye appointment because she says she is having trouble reading the board.  Madison just wants to sleep all day as she played three games of soccer these last two days.  Elliot will be happy that people are around to chase him.  The day will fly by I'm sure.

Things to look for and questions to ask when searching for a skilled nursing care and rehabilitation facility

This list is for people who are looking for a temporary facility and rehabilitation with the plan of returning home.  Medicare pays for 100 days in a nursing facility.  They pay 100% for the first 20 days and then 80% of the remaining days.  Supplemental insurance usually picks up the remaining 20%, but it is a good thing to investigate this prior to checking into a facility.  Fees are anywhere from $135.00 to $150.00 a day.  This should all be discussed with the administration when you visit.

I shall expound on the lists from various websites, using my own experiences in having a mother in a skilled nursing facility.

Basic questions for administrators during the initial visit:

Is this facility Medicare certified?  Is the staff licensed and certified?  Are background checks provided on the staff?

• If you are looking for a Medicare facility, this is the first question to ask.  Not all places take Medicare so it is important to make sure that the facility does accept it otherwise you will be wasting your time. Most of these questions will be answered before you have a chance to even ask them as the owner has access to the Internet just like you and most have trained their administrators to include this in the sales pitch.

What was the rating of the last state certification?  What did the state find that the facility needed to correct?  Are there any lawsuits against the facility?  Are there any filed complaints against the facility?

• Again this is standard in the sales pitch, but if it isn't beware and make sure to ask.  If an administrator is hesitant to answer these questions and/or refuses to give out information, walk away.  This information is public knowledge and can be found on the Medicare website.  You can print this information beforehand and take it with you to the interview.

Is there regular communication between families and administration?  Will there be conferences to discuss the loved one's Care Plan?  How often does this occur?

• Most places have weekly meetings where the rehab therapists and administrators discuss a patient's Care Plan.  This is a nice way to stay in touch with the caregivers who are taking care of your loved one and to voice any concerns you may have.  I would be wary of a facility that did not offer this.

What are the visiting hours?  Is there a code to exit the building after hours?

• Most facilities allow 24 hour visitation.  Be wary of ones that do not.  You want to be able to enter if your loved one calls you in the middle of the night.  Most facilities are locked so that patients can not wander off, but key pads are in place for visitors.  Make sure that the facility offers you the code.

Are the phone calls direct or routed through a switchboard?  Is the switchboard manned twenty four hours?

• In our last facility the phone lines were not direct.  I had to call the main number and ask for my mother's room.  This wasn't a problem until we found out the phones were turned off at seven o'clock every evening when the operator left for the day and were not turned on until seven in the morning. Not only could my mother not receive calls in that twelve hour period, but she could not make calls either.

What is the procedure for checking in?  When will happen once my loved one enters the the facility? Who will we see?  When will she see the doctor first?  How often will she see the doctor?  Is there a pharmacy in house?

• Knowing what the procedure is upon arrival is very important.  You and your loved one should be greeted, taken to your room, and introduced to a variety of people from hospitality to admissions. Paperwork is generally signed at this point and rules and regulations should be explained.  If there are items that your loved one needs that the facility is to provide, make sure that happens then and there. In one of our facility experiences we had to wait quite some time for an oxygen concentrator to be delivered when it was specifically marked that my parent was on oxygen 24 hours.
• In these facilities your loved one usually sees the doctor at check in and then once a week thereafter. Make sure that you see the doctor the very first day!  If you will not see a doctor, look into another facility.  The paperwork that comes with your loved one (usually via a hospitalization) isn't always accurate and a doctor must sign off on EVERYTHING.  If there is a discrepancy, it is best to catch that with the doctor there otherwise getting information to him can take hours and sometimes a day.
• When you see the doctor upon checking in this is a good time to go over the list you have brought of any special requests.  Ask for his business card and a number to reach him if he is willing.  Most doctors visit these facilities before or after seeing their own patients at an office.  If this is the case, ask if the nursing staff can reach him at all times.  Make sure that the nursing staff has his number.
• Go over all your medications with the doctor, including simple or specialized medications you may have brought with you.  Different states have different rules regarding these items.  At one facility we used my mother's A&D ointment and a foot cream were removed from her and placed at the nurses station.  This made it difficult to get to when needed.  This is another reason for the list you provide and have the doctor sign.  Most doctors are willing to allow these types of items in the patient's room.
• Ask the doctor if he is willing to call family members if they are not present at the time of his visit. Again, these doctors pop in and out quickly and without warning.  We had one doctor who made it a point to call me after each visit with my mother to keep me updated and to ask me questions or to hear my concerns.  That is huge!
• If your loved one requires medications, make sure that the pharmacy has been notified and note the time of arrival of medications.  A doctor must sign off on the medications before it can be sent to the pharmacy.  My mother did not receive her night time medications (10 of them) on her first stay at one facility, nor did her roommate five days later upon arriving, and that was after our filed complaints.

What times do you recommend being admitted?  Do you provide transportation from the hospital (or other facility)?  Can we request a time?

• Pay careful attention to these answers.  Timing matters when coming into a facility.  NEVER come into a facility when the nursing staff is changing shifts.  This causes great confusion on both ends and it is usually your loved one that gets the short end of the stick.  Narrow down a time and make sure that the facility adheres to it.  Provided transportation is better too as facilities respond to a vehicle and transporters much in the same way hospitals do to ambulances and paramedics.

Ask for information on the nursing staff's shift hours.  How many different nurses will your parent see in 24 hours.  How many days in a row do they work?  What is the nursing staff to patient ratio?  How many aides are there?  What are their hours?  How many days do they work in a row?

• In our experience the best place is the one in which the nursing staff works several days in a row so there is a consistency.  Most shifts are from 7 am - 3 pm, 3 pm - 11 pm, and 11 pm - 7 am.  If the same nurses work each shift even three days in a row, you will have someone who understands your loved one and his/her needs.  Problems occur, of course, when the nursing staff switches, and no matter what administrators tell you, while information is passed from one nurse to the next, important details do get left out.  
• Come up with a list of things that are important to your loved one and make sure that it is put into their chart.  This is a list that you can go over with the doctor at admitting time and have him sign if necessary.  For example, my mother uses a wheelchair which she likes by her bedside at night.  While she needs assistance in getting to and from the bathroom she is able to transfer herself from the bed to the chair if someone is unable to respond to her call quickly.  Problems arose when a staff member read "needs ambulatory help" and removed the wheelchair from my mother's bedside so that she "would have to call for help".  Had we had a list we could have referred this staff member to that list, signed by the doctor, in her chart.  Always keep copies of the list (with signature) so that the patient has one and so that you have one.

Does the nursing staff have mobile units with computers or does the staff manage from a central location or desk?

• In my experience, and in this day and age, better care is provided if the staff has a mobile unit that has a computer that keeps the patient's chart and medications.  If this is not available, then the staff has to always check in at a desk for answers and this definitely takes away from patient care and time spent with a patient.

How often will a loved one have rehabilitation therapy?  Is it one on one or shared with others?  If shared, with how many other patients?  Do you have a gym or do you work out in a room?  When will the first assessment be done?

• If your main goal is rehabilitation, these are important answers.  A gym, or multiple, gyms are the best as they are larger and offer more equipment and variety.  If rehabilitation is done in a small room it can get quite crowded and overwhelming for some patients.  One on one with a therapist is awesome, but not always a possibility.  Most centers have a ratio of one therapist to three patients which means your loved one is usually left on his own to complete an instructed exercise while the therapist works with one of her other patients.
• Hopefully, the assessments for therapy will happen on the first day of admittance, but that isn't always the case either.  It will depend upon the patient's entrance to the facility.  The later in the day your loved one arrives, the later the assessment; sometimes not until the next day.

Things to look for and questions to ask on the tour of the facility.  Always take a tour.

If it is possible, ask to see the room that your loved one will be in.  Is a private room available?  Will your loved one be sharing a room?  If so, which bed will he be in?  

• Seeing the exact room will help you determine if it is right for your loved one.  If a private room is available and you are interested, make sure that it is assigned to your loved one.  We were told we had a private room in one facility only to find that not the case upon entrance.  The room and bed my mother ended up in was not at all equipped for a wheelchair and she spent several miserable days before we got her moved into a private room.
• When touring a room check the things that are important to your loved one.  Is there a temperature control in the room that residents can manage?  If sharing a room, are there separate thermostats?  Is the bathroom big enough?  Is the bathroom arranged so that your loved one can maneuver in it?  Is there a shower in the bathroom or will your loved one be bathed elsewhere?  The bathroom in one facility my mother was in was not arranged well for a person in a wheelchair and she had great difficulty ending up with a huge hematoma on her arm from bumping up against the toilet paper dispenser jutting out from the wall.  Check for every little thing that will make or break your loved ones comfort level.

Is the facility clean?  Are the hallways well lit?  Is there a distinctive odor?  Do you smell bleach?

• Every facility is going to have some type of scent.  Make sure that it isn't overpowering, nasty, or smelling like bleach as a cover up to something more.  Make sure to look down at the floor and along the baseboards for cleanliness.  A well cleaned facility makes for a healthier one.

Tour the rehabilitation areas.  Are they large?  Do they have a variety of equipment?  Does the place resemble a workout gym?  Are the residents engaged or just sitting waiting for instruction?  

• This goes along with the questions you should ask the administrator in your interview, but seeing for yourself is a plus.  One facility I toured was under construction and not only was it noisy, but the gym was closed due to the construction and the residents were rehabbing in different rooms of various sizes.  We opted not to go with that facility because of the construction despite the rest of it passing our tests because rehabilitation was huge for my mother at the time.  She ended up staying in another facility with a large gym, with wonderful therapists, and where she could interact with other rehabbing patients.

As you tour look at the residents.  Are they up and out of bed?  Are they dressed in clothes or in robes?  Do they appear well cared for?  Do they look happy?  If possible, talk to some of them.

• A facility where the patients get up in the morning and get dressed in their clothes is more like what your loved one does at home.  This is a facility that means business in rehabilitation and not just minimal care.  Not ever resident is going to be smiling or appear happy as you tour, but you can tell if they appear well groomed.  If an opportunity arises and you are able to talk to a resident ask him questions.  I spoke to one woman who was sitting outside a facility enjoying the sunshine.  She was quite happy to tell me about the facility, the positive and the negative, and whether or not she recommended it.  

Is there a dining room for residents to eat in?  How big is the dining room?  Is it a nice room?  Well decorated?  Can residents eat in their rooms?  Is there a choice on meals?  A menu?  How is the food? Ask if the tour guide eats the meals.  Ask to see a meal if available.  Does it look like something you could eat?  If your loved one requires special menus, will that be available?

• Most facilities offer in room and/or a dining room eating.  Residents can do either depending on their mood.  If your loved one has restrictions, make sure that that is discussed at admittance.  My mother came from one facility where "mechanical" meant cutting up her meat for her to another facility where "mechanical" meant pureeing her food so that it looked like something one would feed an infant.  If the food doesn't appear appetizing, it makes it hard to consume and not eating leads to many other problems.  In one facility they offered a menu and choices.  In another facility everyone was given the same meal.  Having choices is much better.

Are their activities outside of rehab?  What sort of activities?  Can residents come and go on their own from their rooms to activities?  

• Most facilities offer various activities.  Ask for a list.  Most facilities have the month's activities on a calendar and will post them in the resident's room and in the hallways.  In one facility my mother stayed in she worked on puzzles with residents in the game area, took exercise classes, and watched movies in the common area while eating popcorn.  If your loved one using oxygen will he be able to switch out to a tank to be mobile?  

It isn't easy picking out a skilled nursing and rehabilitation center.  So far we have not found the perfect facility.  We have found some with great rehab and not such great care.  We have had facilities with little rehab.  We have had places with no problems and places with many problems.  Each of those facilities seemed great when touring them and speaking with the administrators.  Reality was much different.

Remember that the administrators are sales people and that you are the buyer.  Ask questions.  If able, pop in several different times at different hours and take tours.  Check the facility out on Medicare's site.  Ask for recommendations from doctors, nurses, and from people who might have been in a facility.  Also, in the end, ask the administrator if he would put his own loved one in this same facility.  If he hesitates, find a different facility.

My experience with healthcare facilities - part 1

A few years ago, when my mother's charcot foot first began, Medicare chucked her out of the facility she was staying in connected with the hospital.  Her time was up, but because she had a wound vac hooked to her foot and a PICC line in for treatment of MRSA the doctors would not release her to go home.  The next stop would need to be a "skilled nursing facility" with a rehabilitation unit to get her up and moving.  The social worker gave my brother and I a list of facilities in the county and told us to come back with our top three.  With the help of a physical therapist friend of mine and my mother's primary doctor, I got the names of three facilities to tour, and my brother and I set out one morning to do just that.  The experience was demanding, depressing, and very emotional.  I wrote about it on my blog, but then decided not to publish it because I couldn't find an ending to the piece.  Because there is no ending.

Aging parents with health issues is not like it was seventy years ago when they moved in with their children. Today we live in houses built practically on top of one another with smaller rooms and ridiculous layouts. We don't own land to expand and many houses have two working adults.  My brother and I always said we would take care of our parents, but now that reality has hit us we find we are not capable, physically, emotionally, and practically to do what we once promised.  Instead we must find alternatives so that our mother is comfortable and well taken care of, and that is where things get dicey.  There is no magical place.

The facility that my mother stayed in a few years ago was adequate.  She had a private room due to her MRSA diagnosis and because the only private room they had was one that they transferred patients about to be sent home into it simulated a "real" home and came equipped with a refrigerator and microwave.  In skilled facilities a doctor is only obligated to see patients once a week so if a patient is ill the facility has to access and then contact the doctor and follow his instructions.  My mother went through a couple bouts of pneumonia while there and some other mysterious illness that no one really could diagnosis.  The therapy was good, but the caring part was iffy and she lasted almost three weeks before checking herself out and going home.

She has stayed out of a skilled nursing facility since then, instead going from the hospital to acute rehab centers which keep patients for two weeks for intense physical and occupational therapy and where a doctor sees the patients daily.  These places ready you to go home and then send therapists to come into your home to continue the work that you did in their facility.  While these places are the best scenario they aren't always perfect and they aren't always the answer for everyone.

This past month, due to a medication change, my mother was admitted into the hospital for observation for four days.  From there she went into an acute facility where she worked well for almost two weeks, but when the facility opted to keep her another week, she contracted bronchitis, which the doctor did not pick up on.  That facility released her, and because she did not feel ready to go home, she was transferred the skilled nursing facility.  I was once again told to pick three places.  My mother and I discussed places and ended up putting down the one she had been in before, which back then she hated, but which now she calls "adequate", one that my brother and I had visited previously, but had rejected because they were doing loud construction, and one that I then went to visit to make sure.

This facility is three minutes by car from my house.  My friend, Kim, worked there when she was studying to be a nurse over twenty years ago.  I drive by this place daily, but because I remember her stories from there I have never thought to explore it.  Recently a couple of people told me that "friends of theirs" thought it a fine place for their own parents so my mother sent me off to check it out.  And therein lies the difficulty.

Checking out these facilities means meeting with someone in admissions, going over Medicare rules, giving out your parent's situation, and taking a tour.  While you can tell whether they know their stuff and you can see other patients as you walk down hallways and view the rehabilitation center it doesn't tell you what you really want to know.  Will your parent receive good care?  Will they get the rehab they need?  The Internet is, of course, a starting place.  My brother and I armed ourselves with a list of questions to ask from various websites that help the elderly and family members.  But these places and their employees have accessed the Internet too and they answer these questions almost before you can ask them for yourself.  I can see for myself as I take the tour whether the patients are well groomed (90% of them are dressed and sitting up), whether the facility is clean (never have toured one that wasn't), whether it smells of urine or disinfectant (most carry an undefined odor), and whether the residents appear happy (90% of them stare at you like an animal in the zoo).  I've based the majority of my judgement on the rehab portion of the facilities because that has always been the main reason why my mother was coming in the first place.  In the rehab center you see whether patients are being worked with or just sitting in a corner.  You can count the number of therapists and gauge the ratio to patients.  You can view the equipment, the size of the room, and the mood of the staff. Unfortunately, judging that doesn't mean the care outside of the center is what you need.  The only way to know anything for sure is to stay there.

When I visited this place near my house I entered the assisted living portion of the place first and since this might just be an option soon I went ahead and spoke with the director there.  I loved her.  She was a Pittsburgh Steelers fan and gave me some some Steelers cups to take home with me.  "You're easy," my brother said when I texted him.  She gave me loads of information and sent me off with a folder stuffed with papers.  I felt good as I drove around the complex to the other end where the skilled facility was located. The admissions girl (she looked about 19) was knowledgeable, the tour the same as always, the staff courteous and friendly, the residents a mixture of ages, the rehab hopping, and the facility had just passed their state certification and had received a 5 our of 5 rating.  I left feeling this place would be fine for the five days or so my mother felt she needed to recover.  I put it number one on our list for the social worker and felt we were good to go, forgetting what I already had learned from our first skilled nursing experience; there is no magical place.

And here I thought he didn't listen

Me (coming into kitchen):  "I just took an IQ test and I'm "smart".  I'm very proud of that.  I scored a 130, whatever that means.  Well, it says I was "smart" so obviously that is what it means."

Tom (thumbing through a book):  "Have you read this?"

Me:  "Yes, well, I am reading it.  I'm reading it now.  I'm not quite halfway through."

Tom:  "Is it any good?  It looks good."

Me:  "Yes, I'm enjoying it.  (Gets a cup out, opens refrigerator to get ice)  I don't quite like the whole death as a narrator, but the rest of it is good.  It was made into a movie."

Tom:  "It was?"

Me:  "That's why I'm reading it.  I found it in a book store and then saw that it was made into a movie." (Notices ice machine is once again clogged)  "Oh, my god!  This thing drives me crazy.  Why is it doing this?"  (Removes ice container)  "And why am I always the one who has to deal with this?  Why can't someone else see that this needs tending to?"

Tom:  "Because you're the one with the high IQ.  You're smart."

Monday Super Bowl recap

Sigh. 

Seattle defense - Got to give them credit. They came out to play and play they did. The Broncos offense didn't know what hit them, and hit them the Seahawks did; hard. Wherever the ball went there was a navy tighted player there to stuff, punch, pop, and kill. They worked the field and the Broncos' offense and they won the game. 

Denver offense - The line had trouble in the first half holding the defense and Peyton couldn't get his rhythmn or his confidence. He was oft kilter and when Manning is in trouble, well, we see what happens. The line did a better job in the second half, but it was a little too late by then. 

Russell Wilson - Didn't get the Rookie of the Year award when he should have last year. Doesn't matter. He has something more important now. He kept cool and steady. Some of his throws in the fourth quarter were so superior it was just poetry in motion. 

John Elway - Think he was having déjà vu?

Weather - It was suppose to be snowing, and raining, and sleeting, and raining ice cubes during the coldest Super Bowl ever, and instead the weather was clear and warmer in Met Life Stadium then in either Denver or Seattle. 

Halftime show - Bruno Mars knows how to keep moving and entertaining. Could have cared less about the Red Hot Chili Peppers. I don't really get the whole hype for halftime entertainment, but I didn't get up and leave the room either. 

Tim Tebow - The Twitter world loved it because everyone could tweet, "Tebow in the Super Bowl" as if it were clever. It might have been if millions of social media addicts didn't all think alike. However, kudos to T-Mobile for coming up with the idea. Best ads of the night in my view. 

Confetti - What happens with the orange and blue confetti that didn't get used? 

Hall of Fame - Again dissing the Bus? Not cool. Snubbing Tony Dungy? Shameful. Mr. Derrick Brooks? Got one right. 

Terry Bradshaw - We will never know if he would have skipped the big game as a player after the death if his father, but Bradshaw opted to skip it as an analyst, spending time with his family in Louisiana. His father died Thursday and Bradshaw missed his second game as a Fox analyst. Michael Strahan, fresh off his HOF title, put his hosting experience to use as Bradshaw's replacement. 

Super Bowl pick

Denver over Seattle - Ok, I want Peyton Manning to win. Hands down. Bottom line. I feel the win for him. I know Seattle has the defense. I know Seattle has Marshawn Lynch. I like Seattle's Russell Wilson. I just want Peyton Manning to win one more. To shut up all those people who use to think a Super Bowl was necessary to prove greatness and who now believe one win isn't enough. I hope for Manning to be able to have some relief and relaxation for a change. He earned it. Now he just has to seal it. Go Broncos! 

This week's weird things

Each week weird things happen in my life.  Odd things.  Things that I can't explain.  I've decided to keep a list.  To share.

1. Tuesday I went to to the voting poll to cast my ballot for the House of Representatives in the Republican primary.  As I drove into the parking space in the church parking lot, I noticed a sign directly in front of me that told me there was to be absolutely no distributing of material or attempts to seek votes at this polling site.  Duly noted, I thought to myself.  I turned to open my door and noticed an elderly man and woman in the car next to me, parked in an area that was not designated for parking.  The man in the passenger seat indicted that he wanted to speak to me and we rolled down our windows.  I thought he was going to tell me that I wasn't allowed to park in this space for some reason, but instead he smiled.  The woman in the driver's seat said, "He wants to give you something." Uh?  Ok?  The man took a flyer from his lap and reached his hand out his window.  I did the same, stretching to reach the flyer.  I thanked him.  He smiled.  I looked at the flyer.  It was advertising a former marine candidate who would Stop Obamacare!  I looked up at the sign that said no distributing of material or attempts to seek votes.  The sign that was directly in front of the elderly couple's car. Uh.  Hello?  I looked back at the couple.  The woman thanked me for voting.  The window went up and they drove away.  The candidate was not on that day's ballot.  Perhaps that is why they gave it to me?  
2. We have in our area a walking/biking trail that goes from one end of our county to the other end.  The trail crosses various streets and I'm quite familiar with the ones that intersect the routes that I travel. Sometimes I come upon a street I'm not use to driving and I'm traveling faster then I should be when I come across the trail.  Traffic on the trail usually is suppose to stop while car traffic is suppose to slow down, but keep going.  Since my mother has been in rehab I have been traveling a road I very rarely use.  The other day I realized the trail crossed the road when I saw out of the corner of my eye two bikers coming down the trail; a man and a woman.  The man I could see was slowing down to perhaps stop as he saw me coming and was obviously a good biker in following the law.  His female companion saw me, didn't give a hoot, and I could see she was going to barrel right through the intersection.  I was traveling probably faster then I should have and had to brake hard to avoid a collision, despite the male biker putting his hand out to stop his companion.  She went right through as if it were her right without a thank you or a wave.  I stopped and allowed him to follow her.  He shook his head at her stupidity, waved at me, and rode after her.  Two days later as I was coming back from the rehab place, slower this time having learned, I saw two bikers coming down the trail and so I slowed even more.  I think it was the same two bikers as the man slowed, but the woman obviously planned on barreling once again through the stop sign.  Unfortunately she was behind him, and so when he stopped she had to slam on her brakes.  She was none to happy about it as she put her legs on the ground, and in the process of sniping at him she suddenly just tipped over and fell splat right on the ground.  It happened in a slow motion for me as I slowly went on over the trail and past them, and then I wondered if I should have stopped to assist as the man was just staring down at her, shaking his head.  By the time I wondered all of that I was too far down the road to lend a hand.  I haven't seen them since, but what are the chances?

Hump day musings

• Just when I think I can maybe have at least respect for Patriots quarterback Tom Brady, he goes and says something that makes me remember why I didn't care for him in the first place. After losing in the playoffs to the Denver Broncos, Brady in an interview the next day said he wouldn't watch the Super Bowl. He didn't have "much of a rooting interest" in watching a football game. Seriously? My second thought after hearing this interview replayed on ESPN's Sports Center? And there lies the difference between you and Peyton Manning. Because I can pretty much guarantee that Manning, had he lost, would have watched that game and dissected every single play and filed it away for next season. 
• At my almost half a century mark, I am finding myself worrying about the rest of what life I have left. I think we have things turned around.  We should be having fun and traveling while we are young and have our health and working when we are older and looking for things to occupy our time.  I'm worried that by the time I'm able to get out and see the things I've missed in life that I won't be able to do so.
• I realized that this year is going to mark my 20th wedding anniversary.  Boy, twenty years sure went by quickly.  What does one exchange for this milestone?  I mentioned this to my husband while we were out walking the dog.  His response (as usual) was to ask if I was sure this was our 20th.  My response, was to shrug and tell him that my brother had mentioned my marriage in 1994 which made me count the years.  "Where we not married in 1994?" I asked him.  He didn't remember either. Obviously, anniversaries are not high on our lists of concerns.
• I need a manual that guides me through the high school years, especially the latter years when students begin looking towards their futures.  Maybe after we navigate Madison's way through it I'll write a book titled What to Expect When Their Old Enough to Expect It or something along those lines. Why did that book end after the toddler years?  Maybe it didn't, and I just never read any further.  Hmmm..  Will have to look into that.