Reason #1 why there is no take your spouse to work day

Today was "Take your kid to work day" and for once my husband mentioned that fact early enough in the month for us to plan accordingly.  Never have my girls joined him at work on this day to participate in the big hoopla that his work makes of the day.  It wasn't until later that I found out the reason for his bringing it up was because he was put in charge of a project and he figured he could use the girls' help.  No matter.  We put the date on the calendar and assured him they would help out.

Two weeks before the date our school announced that the 8th grade class would become certified in scuba diving and would need to participate in two open water dives, one of which would be help on that same day as the "take your kid to work day".  That meant Madison was out and so my husband recruited my help.  He was to be in charge of photographing and making badges of all of the kids who signed up for the day.  I assured him Darcy and I were up for the task, but as the day grew nearer so did his anxiety.

Tuesday night he came home from work with a black bag so large it could have housed a dead body or two.  In it was a laptop and computer and all the fixings.  He set it up on my kitchen table and called the two of in for training.  Those of you who know my husband and his work hours can just imagine what I'm about to type next.  The time of our training started at 10:00 PM before husband even ate his dinner.  Darcy and I were in no mood for training.  Tom was in no mood for teaching.  Yet we forged on.

And it went something like this:
And it went something like this:

Tom:  "See that icon on the screen? Click on it.  This is the camera software.  Now you have to plug in the camera using this cord, but first we have to take pictures before we do this step.  Who is going to take the pictures?"
Me:  "I thought Darcy was going to take the pictures."
Tom:  "Darcy? You're taking the pictures? You're going to have to learn how to use this camera."
Darcy:  "I know how to use that camera."
Tom:  "No, this is the office's camera so you are going to have to learn how to use it."
Darcy:  "You gave me that camera three weeks ago to play with so that I could learn.  I know how to use that camera."
Tom:  "Oh, that's right.  Okay, well then take a picture."
Darcy:  "Of what?"
Tom:  "You're going to be taking pictures of all the kids that come in tomorrow.  There will be 50 kids."
Darcy:  "No, what do you want me to take a picture of now?"
Tom:  "Take a picture of your mother."
Me:  "I'm in my pajamas.  Don't take a picture of me."
Tom:  "Who cares?  Okay, okay, take a picture of me."

This continued until after midnight with him all stressed and out of joint.  I was annoyed because his system sucked, and when I tried to tweak it to make it work more efficiently and effectively then he would freak out.  Darcy finally wandered away and went to bed.  I pulled Madison into it and between the two of us we worked it out so that everyone was happy and I could take a shower and go to bed.

We got four hours of sleep before the alarm went off.  Darcy and I were dressed and out the door first with Madison who had to be at school by 6:00 AM because her scuba class was heading north for an open water dive.  We dropped her off and headed to the jail where my husband hangs out each day.

Once we got through security and found the right room a few kids were already there.  A woman volunteer was taking pictures.  Tom was behind the computer.  I told him I was reporting for duty and he refused to let me near it the entire two hours we worked on making badges, despite my earlier training.  Darcy was not allowed to take pictures despite her earlier training.  I was pissed.  Darcy was sighing.  Tom was stressed.  His co-worker, who was signing in the kids, thought the three of us were hilarious.  My job ended up as Tom's right hand bozo.  I sat and spelled out the kid's names to him while he typed.  Again, not efficient, but the way he wanted to do it.  Darcy's job was to cut holes in the badges and insert the clips.  Eventually it was all done and distributed.  Darcy and I then spent the next 9 hours learning about what the parents and spouses of all of us did at the sheriff's office.  Tom left us after the badge making and went back to his office.  I think I will eventually forgive him...