You will have to bear with me as this story, like most of the ones I tell, is a two-parter that will all come together in the end. The first part of the story has to do with an app that I downloaded on my telephone. I came across the app via Facebook. One of my fb friends asked if anyone knew of good apps for logging daily meals and exercises. Several people responded, and being in the market for something just like it, I read through several of the suggestions, which led to Apple suggesting more, and I eventually downloaded the app "myfitnesspal".
Every day I faithfully log in my meals for the day, my exercises, and my water intake. The app calculates my information and tells me that I will weigh a certain amount by a certain time if I keep up going the way I did that day. I like the little app and it has helped me in my diet that I started last week after downloading it. If I continue on the way I have, I will lose 9 pounds in 5 weeks. Hmmm...
The second part of the story is that we watched the movie The Way, which by the way (no pun intended) if you haven't seen it you should, as it was the best movie I've seen in a long time - love you Martin Sheen, and in this film there was some beer drinking. Just watching them drink the beer made me long for a bottle of it, but I don't usually drink beer and so the stuff we have in our house is my husband's beer, and he likes dark or lager, which I don't care for. So I was unable to have the beer. But the want didn't go away over the weekend, and so I decided I would buy some Corona on my weekly grocery visit. And I decided, despite my hatred for light beer, that I would purchase Corona light to fit in with my new app diet. But because I didn't make a grocery list before doing the shopping, I forgot the beer. I got the two limes for the beer, but forgot the beer.
Darcy: (unloading groceries) "Don't close the refrigerator! I have two...uh, very small...uh, green shriveled apples for you."
Me: "What? Shriveled apples? Those aren't apples those are limes. AAAAHHHH! I forgot my beer!"
So for several nights every TV show and character had beer in the script and I just kept getting thirstier and thirstier. On Wednesday we stopped by the grocery for deli meat for Darcy's lunch as she was tired of yogurt, her staple. As we went to the check-out lane I remembered the beer and ran back to get it. I reached out for the Corona Extra, but then remembered my app and my weight, and I picked up the Corona light. I proceeded to search the box for the nutrition information thinking that if the calorie difference was minimal I was going for the Extra beer instead. I couldn't find any information on the box, however, and since my app finds out this stuff for me I had a feeling it would be a big difference and so I bought the light. All of this I spoke aloud to my youngest whose ears are always tuned in on stuff that should be of no interest to her, but is.
Now comes the part where the two stories come together. Here it is:
Darcy: "So we're studying drugs in science and the affect it has on your body, and I was feeling tired today, and had to put my head down on the desk. When Mr. D. asked me what was wrong, I told him I was tired, probably from taking that Benedryl you gave me this morning for my allergies. He jumped all over that and explained to the class that "see here was Darcy's reaction to a drug.""
Me: "Great! Now Mr. D. thinks I'm drugging up my daughter."
Darcy: "Yeah, well, that isn't the worst to tell you the truth. Because in homeroom we were talking about nutrition information on the cans and boxes of food, and when we were ending that discussion, I raised my hand and asked, 'Miss P. out of curiosity how many calories is light beer', and she looked at me and said, 'Why? Did your mother or father have beer?'"
Me: "What! Why would you ask that question. And why was she asking that question?"
Darcy: "Because you were wondering how many calories that light beer had the other day at the grocery. And she asked me that probably to make sure I wasn't drinking beer."
Me: "What! Good lord. What did you tell her?"
Darcy: "Well, I told her my mother was drinking the beer. And then I told her the whole story about your app that you downloaded, which she wants to know about by the way, and your diet, and how you wanted some beer, but didn't like the light beer, and that we couldn't find the calories on the box, and that maybe she knew how many calories light beer had so that I could tell you so that you could put that in your app."
Me (groaning): "Oh, lord, these teachers are going to think I'm a drug pushing, beer drinking, nut."
Darcy: "Yeah, I wouldn't worry. All the teachers already know you're nuts!"
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